Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is widely believe that the fictional violence demonstrated on TV is effective entertainment. Others argue that it encourages violent behaviour. I firmly believe with the latter viewpoint because from this many individuals attracted crimes as well as harm their mental well being.
There are numerous reasons why people believe the fictional violance is harmless entertainment. To begin with, people learn a lot of information about violance. It provides various self defences that directly helps people life.In contrast, it provides social awareness for our society that helps people development.For example, some crime shows telicast on tv to give information that every criminals who committed crime , in the end they might suffer their punishment. None can live from prison .
However, many believe that it encourages violent behaviour.Firstly, fictional violenece displayed many crime show only for awareness , but many individuals encourage from that how to do crimes in many ways. In addition, it also affect childrens because they learn what they see on their environment. Its badly affect on people daily lives.Therefore i believe violent behaviour is impairs people daily lives on society.
In conclusion, although many believe fictional violenece showed on televiion is harmless entertainment , i believe it encourges violent behaviour in many ways including, crimes method as well as harm mental health.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the essay is significantly under the 250-word minimum requirement, which limits the depth of development. While the ideas are relevant, they are somewhat underdeveloped; for instance, the argument regarding 'self-defences' is vague and lacks a concrete example. The conclusion is also quite brief. To improve, you must expand your supporting points with more detailed explanations and specific examples to meet the length requirement and provide a more thorough discussion of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices like 'To begin with', 'In contrast', and 'However'. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and there are instances where the logical progression is hindered by awkward phrasing, such as in the second paragraph where the transition between crime shows and prison sentences is unclear. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus will help improve the overall coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There are several spelling errors, such as 'violance', 'telicast', 'criminals', and 'televiion', which occur frequently. Additionally, some word choices are inaccurate or unnatural, such as 'demonstrated' instead of 'portrayed' and 'impairs people daily lives on society'. To achieve a higher score, you should focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensure you proofread your work to eliminate basic spelling mistakes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'It is widely believe' (should be 'believed'), 'many individuals attracted crimes' (should be 'are attracted to crime'), and 'it also affect childrens' (should be 'affects children'). Subject-verb agreement and pluralisation errors are consistent throughout the text. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of these errors limits the score. Focus on mastering basic sentence construction and subject-verb agreement before attempting more complex structures.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.