Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The scenes shown in movies related to violence have greater impact on people’s mental health. Some people believe that it is harmless entertainment, while others argue that it increases the violence among people. This essay will discuss both views before explaining why I believe that violent characters always have negative effects on people’s mental health and their lives.

On the one hand, when films portrayed negative or positive role often influence people. As a result, some people try to follow the same path even without thinking sheathed it is good or bad for them. For example, if movies are presented criminal roles with loud music, some people take it personally which affects their ability to make a good decision. Therefore, these type of movies have worse effect on the audience. In addition, scenes such as criminal activities are often more likely to happen in the movies which may negatively impact viewers

On the other hand, it is believed by some people that violence related movies are just for entertainment, not have any serious impact on the society. Many people watch movies to relax themselves or enjoy with their family or friends. For instance, during weekends, people watch violence movies just to relax which makes them feel more relaxed and comfortable.

In conclusion, although violent scenes give more satisfaction to some people, it may disturb their mental health by showing criminal activity. I believe that government should be banned these type of scenes from the movies to ensure the audience can take great message.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion in the introduction and conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding the negative impact of violent media is repetitive and lacks specific, well-explained examples. The point about 'criminal roles with loud music' is vague and does not clearly link to the psychological mechanism of why this influences behavior. To improve, you should provide more detailed reasoning and concrete examples to support your claims, ensuring that each paragraph fully explores the implications of the topic rather than just stating them.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand,' 'On the other hand,' and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and some transitions are awkward, such as 'without thinking sheathed it is good or bad.' Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the connection between ideas within paragraphs could be smoother. Improving the variety and precision of your linking words will help the essay read more naturally.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision required for a higher band. You rely on simple phrasing, such as 'worse effect' and 'relax themselves.' There are also some issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'government should be banned these type of scenes' (should ban) and 'take great message' (convey a message). To reach a higher band, focus on using more sophisticated vocabulary and ensuring that your word choices are contextually accurate and natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'if movies are presented criminal roles' (if movies present criminal roles), 'not have any serious impact' (do not have), and 'government should be banned' (should ban). Punctuation is generally functional, but the sentence structure is often repetitive. To improve, focus on mastering subject-verb agreement, correct verb forms, and using a wider variety of complex sentence structures with greater accuracy.

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