Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often argue that the fictional violence that showed on television is a inoffensive entertainment. While others believe that it is harmful and encourage people for violent behaviors. While there are valid arguments on both sides but I think that it does not affects people actions because all scenes are not real . This essay will examine both arguments and my view with relevant examples before reaching a logical conclusion.

On the one hand, people watch television as a part of entertainment. Some people watch it for getting instead news and enjoy free times. But most people love to enjoy imaginary violence especially films and movies. They just watch it for a mean of amusement. There is no connection with this scenes in real life. Such as kids and young adults watch marvel movies and these movies all scenes are imaginary which is clearly noticeable for everyone. They just like the character and pass their time. For instance, public also watch romantic and thriller movies but there is no evidence exist that these kinds of movies affect people's behaviors.

On the other hand, there are several reasons why people think that it has side effects on individuals attitudes. One of the main reason is that it mainly affect on child behaviors. Because few children thought that the scenes are real and they also do the same in real life. Therefore, it causes serious accidents which is a negative development. Besides, the actions that showed on series or in movies some dishonest and dangerous people try in real life to kill their enemies. For instance, crime petrol is one of them. To be honest crime petrol is a show which is mainly for create awareness among public but very few are use it for crime.

In conclusion, although both perspective have their own merits but I believe that fictional violence plays a significant roles in people life as a mean of entertainment.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both views and providing a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For example, the argument regarding children's behavior is mentioned but lacks depth or a strong, logical link to the broader societal impact. The conclusion is brief and does not fully synthesize the arguments presented. While the position is clear throughout, the supporting evidence, such as the reference to 'crime petrol', is slightly underdeveloped and could have been explained more effectively to strengthen the argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'For instance', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'While there are valid arguments on both sides but I think...'. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the second paragraph where the connection between sentences could be smoother. Overall, the progression of ideas is coherent, but the use of cohesive devices lacks the flexibility required for a higher band.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'fictional violence', 'amusement', and 'awareness'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'inoffensive entertainment' instead of 'harmless', 'getting instead news', and 'mean of amusement' instead of 'means of amusement'. The range is sufficient to communicate, but the lack of precision and occasional misuse of words limit the score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('It is often argue', 'it does not affects', 'it mainly affect') and article misuse ('a inoffensive'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are persistent and noticeable. The control over complex structures is inconsistent, and the punctuation is generally functional but occasionally imprecise. More attention to basic grammatical rules and proofreading would significantly improve the accuracy of the writing.

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