Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this digital era television as source of entertainment the episodes of hostility in fictions necessitates both benevolent and malevolent behaviour. I undoubtedly disagree that intertainment is harmless as people are being attacked in different societies by masses, who imitates violent behaviours on social media.

Firstly, it encourages adverse aggressive behaviours in children. Studies have shown that toddlers, who watch wrestling at home have a tendency of being inclined to child delinquency, when they are at school. They are malicious to other pupils at kindergarten. This is indicated by social learning theory , which proves that children learn through association as a result of exposure to violence in TVs they watch frequently, it seems parents paved way for entertainment to take over their socialisation role, but it can be noticed that its a threat to the well-being of children.

In addition, hostile behaviour is emanating from movies especially horror and scary movie in which juveniles are exposed to, which is triggering their later life, when they become adults, they can incite domestic violence in their marriage, leading to family disintegration and death of spouses. Studies indicates that even adults, who watch a lot of aggressive movies they have bad manners as well and they are imitating the other male counterparts, whom they saw in movies such as "Rhumbo" movies . Some are resorting to stealing imitating what they have seen in a movie called "Money Heist." As a result of exposure to violence in the entertainment fraternity recently, which is breeding people of odd characters in societies they are from.

In conclusion, while entertainment is there to reduce stress in the masses by providing humorous episodes, it can be argued largely that, it is there to propel a threat in the society of negative behaviours and there is need for government to halt, all hostile fictions in the entertainment industry.

However, action movies are benevolent as they encourage sympathy in human nature and they encourage love, care and compassionate spirit.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat inconsistent. While the impact on children is discussed, the arguments regarding adults are repetitive and rely on generalizations, such as the claim that watching movies leads to 'death of spouses.' The conclusion introduces a new point about action movies being 'benevolent,' which contradicts the earlier stance and creates confusion regarding your final position. To improve, ensure your main arguments are fully supported with logical reasoning rather than extreme examples, and maintain a consistent position throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical flow is occasionally disrupted by awkward transitions and sentence structures. For example, the final paragraph introduces a counter-argument that should have been integrated into the body of the essay rather than appearing after the conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly' and 'In addition,' but they are sometimes applied mechanically. The referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the second paragraph where the connection between social learning theory and the parents' role is disjointed. Improving the logical progression between sentences would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, including terms like 'delinquency,' 'disintegration,' and 'benevolent.' However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'entertainment fraternity,' 'propel a threat,' and 'episodes of hostility in fictions.' Spelling errors, such as 'intertainment' and 'Rhumbo' (likely referring to Rambo), also occur. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your message, they limit the precision and sophistication of your writing. Focus on learning the correct context for academic vocabulary to improve your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that affect the flow. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Studies indicates,' 'movies... they have'), incorrect article usage, and punctuation errors. Some sentences are overly long and fragmented, such as the second sentence of the first paragraph. While you attempt complex structures, the control is inconsistent, leading to errors that occasionally require the reader to re-read for clarity. To reach a higher band, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and refining your use of complex sentence connectors.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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