Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Opinions differ regarding the impact of fictional violence portrayed on television. While some individuals think that it is harmless entertainment, I largely believe that it can encourage violent a behavior.
The depiction of violent behavior in the media can be a good source of entertainment especially to individuals who are interested with such kind of media. For example, while other types of entertainment such as the cartoons can be boring to adults, violent content is entertaining especially to individuals who like action movies and it has nothing to do with behavior change.
Nevertheless, it would be unrealistic to overlook the fact that the information absorbed daily can influence a persons character by increasing aggression among the viewers. For instance, if a child who does not understand English watches cartoons displayed in English, they If a child is exposed to violent cartoons, they may internalize aggressive behavior.
Furthermore, excessive exposure to fictional violence may reduce empathy and make individuals less sensitive to the suffering of others. For example, researchers have found an association between the behavior of several criminals and their interest in fictional violent movies online which clearly illustrates the relationship between the reality and information absorbed by human brain.
To conclude, while the exposure to violent movies can be entertaining, it also
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you address both sides of the argument and provide a clear personal opinion, the conclusion is incomplete, cutting off mid-sentence. This prevents a full development of your position. To improve, ensure you fully expand on your supporting points and provide a complete, well-structured conclusion. The ideas presented are relevant, but the lack of length and the unfinished nature of the essay mean that the task is only partially addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the progression of your argument. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Nevertheless', 'Furthermore', and 'For instance' to link your ideas. However, the abrupt ending of the essay disrupts the overall coherence. Additionally, some transitions feel slightly mechanical. To achieve a higher band, focus on ensuring that your ideas flow smoothly from one sentence to the next and that your conclusion effectively synthesizes the points made in the body paragraphs without being cut off.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'internalize', 'aggression', and 'empathy'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'interested with such kind of media' (should be 'interested in such kinds of media') and 'relationship between the reality and information absorbed by human brain' (should be 'the human brain'). The vocabulary is generally sufficient to convey your meaning, but it lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands. Expanding your range of academic collocations would be beneficial.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'violent a behavior' (should be 'violent behavior') and 'a persons character' (missing apostrophe: 'person's'). You also have a sentence fragment: 'they If a child is exposed to violent cartoons, they may internalize aggressive behavior.' These errors do not generally impede communication, but they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on proofreading for basic punctuation and subject-verb agreement to improve your accuracy.
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