Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many individual believes that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless to our minds with the thinking of that they are not real . others disagree think it encourages aggressive behaviour in concern of people who take fiction character as their idols and change their behaviour according to the character. both of the view have valid reasons

peoples who think violence shows in the movies and drama are only for entertainment any nothing will be affected by it in their nature it is because movies and drama are only for entertainment purposes and they are not real as an example many movies are made in outside space or based on time machine but we all know that they all are not possible in reality.

Although sometimes they make an impact on a person mind especially children with developing mind that is due to many may think that fictional character are real and follows the behaviour of them sometimes it is good but sometimes they develop a aggressive personality. as an example recent research shows that reason for many children who develops violent personality are manly because of fiction violence

To conclude, Many may think that the friction are completely harmless because they are not real . but sometimes it affect others by developing an aggressive behaviour in them same as the characters in the fiction . both of these arguments have different reasons. but it is important that all should reduce number of hours watching television with concern of safety .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, fulfilling the basic requirements of the task. However, the development of ideas is limited. The arguments are somewhat repetitive and lack depth; for example, the point about 'time machines' is not clearly linked to the broader debate on violence. The conclusion introduces a new suggestion (reducing television hours) that was not previously discussed, which weakens the coherence of the argument. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific, well-reasoned examples and ensure your opinion is clearly integrated throughout the essay rather than just mentioned in the introduction and conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow between sentences is often disjointed. Cohesive devices are used, but they are frequently mechanical or misused (e.g., 'in concern of', 'as an example'). The transition between the two views is abrupt, and the paragraphing is somewhat inconsistent. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the use of 'they' in the second paragraph, which makes it difficult to track whether you are referring to the viewers or the fictional characters. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring clear pronoun references would significantly enhance the readability and logical progression of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'friction' instead of 'fiction', 'manly' instead of 'mainly', and 'any nothing' which is ungrammatical. You rely on basic vocabulary and struggle with collocations. To improve, focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to media and psychology, and pay closer attention to word forms. The repetition of basic phrases like 'movies and drama' and 'fictional character' limits your ability to demonstrate a more sophisticated lexical range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('Many individual believes', 'peoples who think'), article misuse, and sentence fragments. While you attempt some complex structures, they are often inaccurate, which can occasionally impede the reader's understanding. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing commas and incorrect capitalisation. To improve, you should focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles. Reducing the number of complex sentences until you have better control over basic grammar will help you produce more accurate and error-free writing.

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