Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Opinions differ regarding the impact of the fictional violence portrayed on television. While some individuals think that it is harmless entertainment, I largely believe that it can encourage a violent behavior. Examining both perspectives provides a clearer understanding of the matter.

The depiction of violent behavior in the media can be a good source of entertainment especially to individuals who have interest in real action movies. For example, while other types of entertainment such as cartoons can be boring to adults, fictional violence is entertaining especially to people who like crazy contents. Consequently, becoming the best source of entertainment to them.

Nevertheless, it would be unrealistic to overlook the fact that the information absorbed regularly can influence a person's character by increasing aggression. Essentially, Young viewers may imitate the behavior of fictional characters particularly when those characters are portrayed as powerful or successful. For instance, if a child who does not understand English watches a cartoon animation displayed in English, they may internalize aggressive behavior and imitate the characters in the movie.

Furthermore, excessive exposure to fictional violence may reduce empathy and make individuals less sensitive to the suffering of others. For example, researchers have found an association between the behavior of several criminals and their interest in fictional violent movies online, which clearly illustrates the relationship between the reality and information absorbed by human brain.

To conclude, although the exposure to violent movies can be entertaining, I strongly believe that it can encourage violent behavior by reducing empathy and increasing aggression among the viewers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The essay addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both views and providing a clear personal opinion. The position is consistent throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. The argument regarding the 'harmless' nature of violence is underdeveloped, relying on vague phrases like 'crazy contents' rather than exploring the psychological concept of catharsis or escapism. The second body paragraph provides better support, though the example of a child not understanding English is slightly illogical, as the language barrier would likely prevent the child from internalizing the narrative context of the violence. To reach a higher band, ensure that arguments are supported by more logical and nuanced reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the two opposing views. Cohesive devices such as 'Nevertheless', 'Furthermore', and 'To conclude' are used effectively to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the referencing within sentences could be more sophisticated. For instance, the phrase 'Consequently, becoming the best source of entertainment to them' is a sentence fragment that disrupts the flow. Improving the connection between sentences would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, with some attempts at more precise language such as 'internalize', 'excessive exposure', and 'aggression'. However, there are instances of awkward word choices and collocations, such as 'have interest in real action movies' (should be 'an interest in') and 'crazy contents' (which is too informal and imprecise). The phrase 'information absorbed by human brain' is also slightly unnatural. To improve, focus on using more academic collocations and avoiding informal or vague descriptors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'encourage a violent behavior' (the article 'a' is unnecessary here) and 'the reality and information absorbed by human brain' (missing articles). Additionally, the sentence 'Consequently, becoming the best source of entertainment to them' lacks a subject and verb, making it a fragment. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Increasing the variety of complex structures while ensuring subject-verb agreement would be beneficial.

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