Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is undeniable that television fictional violence on society making a debate. In this regard some people argue that is harmless entertainment, others believes it is fosters aggressive in viewers. I agree to a large extent with this notion due to many reasons outline in forthcoming fragments with logical conclusion.

To commence with, there are several benefits of this statement. Firstly, proponents of television violence view it as harmless escapism. They argue that the vast majority of mature audiences can easily distinguish between fabricated story lines and reality. To these viewers, actions films and crime dramas offer suspense, intricate plots, and high production value rather than call to violence. Furthermore, some psychological theories suggest that watching fictional violence can serve as a form of catharsis. By experiencing intense emotions safely on screen, individuals may actually release everyday tension and stress without posing any dander to society.

However, a substantial body of evidence suggests that persistent exposure to fictional violence alerts human behavior. When viewers, particularly children and young adults, repeatedly witness aggressive acts being rewarded or normalized on television, they begin view violence as an acceptable method for resolution. This constant exposure can lead to lowering a person's natural empathy toward real-world victims. For example, numerous psychological studies have demonstrated that children who habitually watch violent cartoons are more likely to display physical and verbal aggression on the playground compared to peers who watch educational programming.

To conclude, although there are several benefits of these statement such as emotional release, catharsis and suspense and action. Yet disagreement of this statement can never be neglected at any cost

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, such as the concept of catharsis and the impact of normalized violence on children. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The conclusion is underdeveloped and lacks a final summary of your position, which is a requirement for a higher band. While the main body paragraphs are well-structured, the introduction is slightly awkward in its phrasing, such as 'television fictional violence on society making a debate'. To improve, ensure that your conclusion synthesizes the arguments presented rather than just stating that the disagreement cannot be neglected.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central theme. Cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Furthermore', and 'However' are used to guide the reader through the argument. However, there are instances where the flow is slightly mechanical or the referencing is unclear, such as in the final sentence of the conclusion, which feels abrupt and disconnected from the previous points. The transition between the benefits of catharsis and the negative impacts on children is handled well, but the overall cohesion could be improved by using more varied linking words and ensuring that the conclusion provides a more cohesive summary of the preceding arguments.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'proponents', 'escapism', 'intricate plots', and 'normalized'. There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'alerts human behavior' (likely meant 'alters') and 'posing any dander' (meant 'danger'). Additionally, phrases like 'fosters aggressive in viewers' are grammatically incorrect. While you attempt to use less common vocabulary, the inaccuracies occasionally hinder the precision of your expression. To reach a higher band, focus on using collocations more accurately and proofreading for small slips in word form.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you successfully employ complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors that persist throughout the text. Examples include 'others believes it is fosters' (subject-verb agreement and word form errors) and 'they begin view violence' (missing 'to'). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but there are minor errors in sentence construction that require the reader to pause. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of infinitives after verbs like 'begin'. Increasing the frequency of error-free complex sentences will help elevate your score.

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