Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-09-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In today's rapidly changing world, there are some masses believe that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment, whereas other argues that it encorages voilent behaviour. Although watching such programmes can be entertaining and does not necessarily affect every viewer. In this essay the discusstion regarding both the views would be done before sharing my own opinion.
On the one hand, ficitional violence can be considered harmless entertainment. many people watch action films and programmes to relax and enjoy exciting stories. Although this all is imaginary, most adults are able to understand the difference between fiction and reality. for examlpes : Marvel movie often contain fighting and destruction, but viewers genrally understand that seens are created only for entertainment perposes.
On the other hand, frequent exposure to voilence may encourage aggressive behaviour in some people. In concern of children, as they may not have enough maturity to understand that what they see on screen is not real. if they regualrly watch such characters they may consider violence a normal way of dealing with things. For example, a child who frequently watches voilent cartoons may try to copy the actions of their favourite character while playing with friends.
In my opinion, fictional violence is not always harmful, but its effects depends on the age of the viewer and the amount of violent content they watch. Although fictional violence can provide harmless entertainment for many adults, excessive exposure can negatively influence behaviour, especially among children.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the essay is slightly under the 250-word minimum, which limits the depth of the arguments. While the ideas are relevant, they are somewhat underdeveloped; for instance, the point about children could be expanded with more specific psychological or societal implications. The position is consistent, but the brevity prevents a fully developed discussion. To improve, ensure you expand on your examples and provide a more thorough explanation of the consequences of the views presented to meet the length requirement and demonstrate a higher level of critical thinking.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs for each viewpoint, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'Although' are used to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally hindered by minor errors in sentence structure and punctuation. The transition between the introduction and the body could be smoother. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the overall progression of ideas is somewhat mechanical. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but there are several spelling errors, such as 'encorages', 'voilent', 'ficitional', 'examlpes', 'genrally', 'seens', 'perposes', and 'regualrly'. These errors are frequent enough to be noticeable. While the student attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'fictional violence' and 'aggressive behaviour', the range is limited. To reach a higher band, you should focus on accuracy in spelling and attempt to incorporate more sophisticated collocations and academic vocabulary to express your ideas with greater precision and variety.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Examples include 'there are some masses believe' (incorrect relative clause), 'other argues' (subject-verb agreement), and 'In concern of children' (incorrect prepositional phrase). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of colons and sentence fragments like 'For example, a child who...'. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors impacts the overall quality of the writing. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and refining complex sentence construction will help improve your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.