Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Several indviduals believe that fictional violance and disturbing activities displayed on televisions and cinemas is safe entertainment. Opponents argue that watching these shows and series influence extreme behaviour. In this essay i will delineate the underline forces of fictional violence and then i will place my perspevtive.
Initially,The perception of reality is bigger than the reality itself. Whatever we watch and we listen it has a huge impact on our brain. In this contemporary society lot of movies and series are normalizing killing and adult scenes. These scenes are presented in such a way that human brain believe that killing, punching and assaulting someone is completely normal but reality is completely opposite. For example kids who grew up watching reality shows and story cartoons are much more calm and polite than kids who grew up watching movies and series with action and crime thriller movies. This how violent and disturbing shows and movies influence enourages individuals to commit crimes and other crimininal activities.
On the other hand opponent argue watching series and movies with extreme and disturbing scenes is fun and everyones knows it is just a movie. Which is completely normal in their eyes because they are so used to it . They also believe that human should have control on himself rather than blaming movies and films enourages. According to them human is responsible for his actions there is no such thing that influences human.
As far as i am concerned extreme adult scenes and graphic violence shown in movies encourages individuals to take part in unimaginable crimes and we should stand a gaurd at the gate of our minds and monitor what are we watching
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both views on fictional violence—that it is harmless entertainment versus that it encourages violent behaviour—and clearly presents the writer's own opinion in the introduction and conclusion. Ideas are relevant, such as the discussion on the normalisation of killing and the counter-argument that individuals are responsible for their own actions. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited and occasionally repetitive. For instance, the argument regarding children is brief and lacks deeper elaboration. The position is maintained throughout, but supporting points would benefit from more extended explanation and varied real-world examples to fully achieve a higher band descriptor.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt at paragraphing, dividing the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion distinctly. However, the logical progression is occasionally hindered by abrupt transitions and mechanical cohesive devices. For example, the second paragraph starts abruptly with 'Initially,' followed by a comma splice and punctuation errors ('Initially,The perception...'). Referencing is sometimes unclear, particularly in phrases like 'This how violent and disturbing shows and movies influence enourages individuals...' where transitional links are missing or confused. Paragraphing is present, but internal cohesion requires better linking words to guide the reader smoothly through the arguments.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to convey basic arguments about violence and entertainment. However, there are numerous spelling errors and inaccurate word choices throughout the text, such as 'indviduals', 'violance', 'underine', 'perspevtive', 'enourages', 'crimininal', and 'gaurd'. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary items like 'contemporary society', 'graphic violence', and 'crime thriller', but the frequent lexical errors and typos restrict the band score. The range of vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the main points, but errors in spelling and word forms occasionally draw the reader's attention away from the content.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over sentence structure (e.g., conditional-like clauses and subordinate structures in 'For example kids who grew up watching...'). However, grammatical accuracy is weak due to frequent errors, including missing articles ('in this essay i will delineate', 'human brain believe'), subject-verb agreement issues ('human is responsible', 'movies and films enourages'), punctuation errors (lowercase 'i', missing spaces after commas), and structural fragments ('This how violent...'). These errors are noticeable and require some effort from the reader to interpret, although they do not completely impede overall communication.
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