Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The given topic discusses the fictional violence displayed on social media platforms Some of the people discuss that its not good for society. While some individuals thinks it boosts up knowledge about violent behaviours of society. I strongly agree that fictional violence should be advertised on social media platforms and also on entertainment platforms so violent behaviour should be condemed.

Firstly, fictional violence should be portrayed on televisions and other social media platforms so the people should have knowledge of these things. Because these type of violence are strongly harming our society. Men, women and childrens all are the victims of these types of violence so there should be a place for raising voice for these types of violences. So people should be afraid and stop these violences in front of them or if its happening in surroundings. Furthermore,these measures will help in reducing these types of violence in our society.

Secondly, these types of entertainment wil notl harm anyones feelings or play a negative role in society. Because there should be a knowledge of all types of violences that are taking place in society. Social media is the best way in todays era to raise voice against the wrong things that are occuring in society. Different types of dramas or short stories illustrates many violences or victims that have faced fictional violence. individual of all ages should learn about violence so that they can stop or dont become a victim of these types of violence.

In, cconclusion in my opinion government and law enforcing authoritiers should take steps to help the entertainment industry to make these types of fictional violence stories so that everyone have knowledge of these things it will make our society free of crimes and also encourage individuals to stop these types of violences around them as they can play vital role in these things.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response addresses the task only partially. While the prompt asks for a discussion on whether fictional violence is harmless or encourages violent behaviour and requires a personal opinion, the student's argument is somewhat confused. The essay discusses 'fictional violence displayed on social media platforms' rather than strictly television, and the writer's position struggles with clarity, stating both that fictional violence should be shown so people are aware, but also contradicting this slightly by suggesting it stops violence. Ideas are limited and under-developed, relying on repetitive points about awareness rather than fully exploring both sides of the debate regarding television content. To move up, the writer needs to clearly separate the two views requested by the prompt, expand on each argument with more depth, and maintain a consistent, well-articulated position throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is some organisation evident with the use of standard paragraph breaks and basic sequence markers such as 'Firstly,' and 'Secondly,', yet there is no clear overall progression throughout the essay. The logical flow is hindered by abrupt shifts in ideas and repetitive arguments regarding raising awareness. Cohesive devices are sometimes used inaccurately or mechanically, as seen in awkward transitions like 'In, cconclusion in my opinion'. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal paragraph cohesion is weak because sentences often jump between ideas without smooth linking. To achieve a higher score, the writer must ensure a logical progression of ideas from introduction to conclusion, use a wider and more accurate range of cohesive devices, and ensure that referencing remains clear throughout.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to convey a basic message, with noticeable errors that cause some difficulty for the reader. The student attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'authoritiers' and 'condemed', but these are marred by spelling mistakes and awkward word choices. There are also instances of repetition, such as continually using 'these types of violences'. Word choices like 'boosts up knowledge' lack natural collocation and precision. To improve this area, the writer needs to expand their lexical repertoire, pay closer attention to word formation and spelling, and focus on using phrases that sound natural and appropriate for an academic discussion.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a very limited range of structures, relying mostly on simple sentences with occasional, mostly faulty, attempts at complex forms. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'some individuals thinks'), article usage, pluralisation (e.g., 'childrens', 'violences'), and sentence fragments. Punctuation is also problematic, with incorrect comma placement and run-on structures. These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader. To progress, the student should work on increasing the variety of sentence structures, ensuring accurate grammatical control over verb tenses and plurals, and reducing the frequency of basic structural errors.

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