Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In the world Social media where televison used to be one of the main entertainment source of people in most of the household which provides many entertaining channels including cartoon, movies, shows, series.

Some people thinks that the voilence portrayed on telivision is harmless entertainment because people think like its just a fictional role played by actors to entertain people throught the television, many people loves action movies and dramas which leads to craze to watch it on television, it also inspires the directors and producer what they're producing what audience like the voilence and how much the actors perform on the fights, discussion, rude behaviour people like them so they could get more opportunities And in the other hand where some people think that it encourages voilent behaviour is like they think like the fictional drama which is being portrayed to the people in the name of entertainment it might be sure of an entertainment but might lead to a bad mindset or can give ideas to bad people how to fight, how things work which they could possibly lead to robbery, fighing on roads, pointing gun, showing voilent behaviour in movies has been normalized where people has started taking it normally, that type of movie inspires some people to fight on social places abuse peoples in public places where younger people elder people might be there.

I think that the fictional voilence portrayed on television is not harmless entertainment it is harmful because many people might take it has an inspirational normalizing things like abusing or fighting with their partner or friends and family or even in public places where it might harm the people nearby there might be childrens and elderly people.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both views on fictional television violence and providing a personal opinion, which sits at a partial level of task fulfilment. However, the development of ideas remains limited and under-developed. While you mention that violence might give bad people ideas or lead to bad mindsets, these points are repetitive and lack specific, extended support or clear examples from your own knowledge. Additionally, your position is stated briefly at the end rather than being consistently integrated throughout the response. To move to a higher level, you should ensure that each main point is fully explained with distinct reasoning and detailed elaboration.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

Your writing shows some basic organisation, attempting an introduction, a body paragraph, and a conclusion, but there is no clear overall progression of ideas. The central body paragraph is structured as a single massive run-on sentence that strings multiple independent clauses together with commas and weak conjunctions like 'and' or 'where'. This makes the logical flow difficult to follow. Furthermore, cohesive devices are noticeably inadequate and repetitive, relying heavily on basic words like 'and', 'also', and 'where'. To improve, you need to break down your long sentences into manageable chunks, organise your thoughts into distinct paragraphs for each viewpoint, and use a wider variety of appropriate cohesive ties.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for the task, featuring noticeable errors in word choice, spelling, and word form that can cause some difficulty for the reader. For instance, you misspell 'television' as 'televison' and 'telivision', and 'violence' as 'voilence'. There are also awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'craze to watch it' and 'abuse peoples'. You attempt some less common vocabulary items like 'inspiration' and 'normalized', but these are accompanied by errors. To achieve a higher score, you need to expand your lexical range, learn accurate spellings, and use words with greater precision regarding collocation and register.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammatical range is quite limited, consisting mostly of lengthy, faulty attempts at complex sentences rather than a controlled mix of structures. The text contains frequent errors that cause difficulty for the reader, particularly regarding run-on sentences, missing punctuation, and faulty subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Some people thinks', 'people has started'). Clauses are frequently strung together without proper subordination or terminal punctuation. To progress, you need to focus on foundational sentence boundaries, ensuring that every sentence expresses a complete thought with a clear subject and verb, while reducing the density of grammatical errors in your complex structures.

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