Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some people argue that the fictional violence potrayed on Television is just entertainment and doesnot cause any harm while some argued that it encourages violent behaviour. I partially agree that it does encourages violent behaviour but if it is not being viewed as a motivated or encouraging thing.

Supporters of the cause argued that the violence potraying in the Television does not cause any harm. Many people watch boxing and violent program but do not show aggressive behaviour. For example the viewers of money heist which breaks the rating chart shows violence but do not have impact on crime rate.

On the other hands critics belived children and young people have impact on their behaviour by watching the shows because they imitate what they saw on the screen specially if violence is shown as heroic and without any consequences.Some times viewers may become less sensitive to crime and show no emotions while crime is happening. For instance some parents report that the children copy fighting moves from the action cartoon and films which sometimes lead to real injuries.

In my opinion fictional violence is not harmful for everyone but it can have negative impact on children or young adults.for example a mature adult watching a crime thriller will watch it as a just entertainment factor while a 10 year old watching it may copy the aggression he sees.Therefore, parents should check the rating and violence scenes and talk to children about them. So the entertainment mean will remain as a entertainment and have no harmful impact on the society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both views on fictional television violence and presenting a clear personal opinion. Your position is stated in the introduction and maintained throughout the essay. However, some ideas are under-developed or lack full extension. For instance, while you mention that programs like 'money heist' do not impact crime rates, this idea is stated rather than thoroughly explained. Similarly, your supporting example about action cartoons leading to real injuries is concise but could be expanded with more detailed elaboration to fully meet the requirements of higher bands. To progress further, ensure every main point is supported by deeper explanations and fully developed examples rather than brief assertions.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear structural progression from introduction to body paragraphs and a concluding stance. Paragraphing is utilised appropriately to separate different perspectives, with body paragraph one discussing the supportive view, body paragraph two examining the critical perspective, and the final paragraph delivering your own opinion. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty. Phrases like 'On the other hands' contain grammatical inaccuracies, and referencing or transition links between sentences can feel abrupt, such as moving directly into examples without smooth connecting devices. Improving the flexibility and accuracy of your cohesive ties will enhance the overall flow and logical progression of your arguments.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

An adequate range of vocabulary is employed for the task, successfully communicating your central arguments about television violence. You attempt less common vocabulary items and phrases, such as 'fictional violence', 'aggressive behaviour', and 'desensitised', though these are occasionally marred by spelling mistakes and word choice issues, such as 'potrayed' instead of 'portrayed', 'doesnot' instead of 'does not', and 'entertainment factor'. There are also some minor word-form slips, such as 'belived' instead of 'believed' and 'entertainment mean' instead of 'medium of entertainment'. These lexical inaccuracies do not impede communication, but they reflect a need for greater precision in spelling and word choice to reach higher proficiency levels.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting relative clauses and conditional structures, such as 'specially if violence is shown as heroic and without any consequences' and 'a mature adult watching a crime thriller will watch it as a just entertainment factor'. There are some recurring errors in grammar and punctuation, including missing articles ('watch it as just entertainment'), punctuation placement with capitalisation in the middle of sentences ('adult.for example'), and subject-verb agreement issues ('children copy... which sometimes lead'). Fortunately, these errors rarely impede communication and the meaning remains clear throughout. To achieve a higher band, focus on increasing the frequency of error-free complex sentences and polishing your control over articles and punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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