Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
Some people think that the fictional voilence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment and some people disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.
There are both advantages and disadvantages in my opinion the fictional violence portrayes on television is harmless entertainment i disagree about this view.
Initally this is more harmfull for little and teenager child beacause in this time the parents have no time to take their babies with themself anytime . All parents go on their job so that make child harmful The child have no option to play with parents and get some knowledge so all teenager watch television overtime the child don't like to do their duties .
One of the main reason eye harm when they see television overtime . fictional violence portrayed on television is harmfull entertainment . All people have give time to talk
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 3.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5
The response is severely limited by its length, containing only 134 words, which is well below the 250-word minimum requirement. Furthermore, eight words copied directly from the prompt were not counted. The writer attempts to address the prompt by mentioning both views and briefly stating a personal disagreement, as seen in the sentence 'in my opinion the fictional violence portrayes on television is harmless entertainment i disagree about this view.' However, the ideas remain minimal, disconnected, and under-developed. There is no real extension of the arguments regarding why fictional violence is harmful or harmless, and the response lacks supporting examples from knowledge or experience. To improve, the writer needs to fully explore both sides of the debate with well-supported arguments and meet the required word count.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.0
Information and ideas are not arranged coherently, and the overall progression is extremely difficult to follow. The text is divided into short, disjointed paragraphs, with the second paragraph shifting abruptly between the two opposing views and the writer's personal opinion without clear logical organisation. Cohesive devices are largely absent or misused, such as the sudden transition 'Initally this is more harmfull' which does not logically connect to the previous sentence. Referencing is also problematic, with unclear pronouns like 'this' and 'they' making it hard to track the intended meaning. Paragraphing is insufficient and used inappropriately. To achieve higher bands, the writer must structure ideas into distinct paragraphs for each view and the conclusion, using appropriate cohesive devices to guide the reader smoothly through the argument.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is basic, repetitive, and limited in range. The student relies on simple terms and makes frequent errors in word choice, word form, and spelling that strain the reader. Examples of lexical inaccuracies include 'voilence', 'portrayes', 'harmfull', and 'Initally'. Phrases like 'take their babies with themself anytime' and 'make child harmful' demonstrate poor collocation and unnatural phrasing. There is also unnecessary repetition of the word 'television' and phrases drawn directly from the prompt. To move to a higher band, the writer needs to expand their vocabulary range, use less common lexical items accurately, and focus on correct spelling and word formation in context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
The grammatical range is very limited, consisting mostly of simple and attempted complex sentences that are heavily flawed. Errors are frequent and often distort the meaning. There are persistent issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'the child don't like', article usage, pluralisation ('teenager child'), and prepositions. Sentence structures are often run-on or fragmented, as seen in 'All parents go on their job so that make child harmful The child have no option...' Punctuation is also neglected, with missing periods and uncapitalised beginnings in places. To improve, the writer needs to demonstrate a greater variety of sentence structures and improve basic grammatical accuracy, ensuring that clauses are correctly joined and verb forms agree with their subjects.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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