Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many people say that the fictional violance portrayed on television is harmless entertainment while others says that it can encourage violent behaviour among people, I partly agree that it can encourage violent behaviour among individuals.

A person who is more exposed to violence whether it is fictional or in real life can get used to it unfortunatly and there are studies which support this claim, many criminals who have done some violance had seen either fictional or not some kind of gore or violent behaviour portrayed in real life or on television which can cause mentally or physical harm to people around them.

having said that i also think that censoring or banning every little thing that one can say is violent which can also be subjected would mean that there is first no freedom of speech and it can also make people forget how harmful some things can be, Also there are poeple who can be better at handling fictional voilance than others so who knows how much a person can handle. Also some things can be expressed better if it can be able to show a little bit of violent behavior in them like in some movies.

In conclusion, I think there should be a control or some rule on how much a violene can be shown on a television, it shoudn't be just all censored and it shoudn't be all blood and gore. Some movies and films are great because actors were able to show how violent behavior can lead to harm either mentally or physically.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You present a relevant position—“I partly agree”—and discuss both the possibility that violent content can influence viewers and the argument against excessive censorship. The point that some films use violence to show its harmful consequences is also relevant. However, the two views are not developed evenly: the claim about criminals and exposure is broad and unsupported by a specific example, while the harmless-entertainment view is mainly represented through freedom of speech and differences in viewers’ tolerance. Clarify why fictional violence may be harmless for many people, then support each side with a concrete example or explanation. Your conclusion proposes control rather than total censorship, but make this position more precise and connect it directly to the arguments above.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate discussion paragraphs and a conclusion, and phrases such as “having said that” and “In conclusion” signal shifts in the argument. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow. The second paragraph moves from becoming accustomed to violence to criminals and then to harm, without clearly explaining the links. The long paragraph beginning “having said that” combines censorship, freedom of speech, individual tolerance and film-making in one sequence. Some sentences also run together, making relationships between ideas unclear. Give each paragraph a clear central point, use shorter sentences to explain it, and make references such as “it” and “some things” more specific.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “fictional violence,” “violent behaviour,” “censoring,” “freedom of speech” and “blood and gore,” so the main subject is clear. However, the range is limited and several expressions are repeated, particularly “violent behaviour” and “harm.” Some word choices or combinations are unclear, such as “how much a person can handle” and “some things can be expressed better if it can be able to show.” Spelling errors—including “violance,” “unfortunatly,” “poeple” and “voilance”—are noticeable and reduce accuracy. Build a more precise set of terms for discussing media effects and censorship, and check spelling and collocations carefully during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional idea in “if it can be able to show” and a relative clause in “movies … because actors were able to show.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and sentence boundaries and agreement are inconsistent. For example, “Many people say … while others says” has a subject–verb agreement error, while the opening sentence joins several clauses with commas rather than separating them clearly. The sentence beginning “A person who is more exposed” also becomes difficult to control as it continues. Practise building accurate sentences with one main idea, checking agreement and verb forms, and use full stops or conjunctions to avoid comma splices.

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