Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is thought by some people that fictional violence is an harmless entertainment presented in the television.But I think that it deopends on age ,mindset and the area where people are living .

The peo[ple who are mature and love to watch fictional movies see it as harmless entertainment .It is because when they get free time from their busy routine they spend their time watching fictional violence as an entertainment source . Other people watch it when they are with their friends and often with their cousins as an entertainment source so it doesnot harm them and their mentality.another reason that why it is harmless is that people watch it as entertainment and they loved in doing so.For example , whenever we meet with our friends on weekends we went to cinema to watch a movie and most likely a fictional violence one so.

On the other hand, it also badly ffect children and prople of higher ages when they see violence on television they become insecre about their safety ,even if they are living in a safe area .They become more concerned about their safety .Another reason why it can be negative is that it can bring aggresiveness and less emotion in children and young people . Children can take fight and aggressive behaviours as normal .For example iff children see violence on television they will become more participant in fights and arguing.

In conclusion, many people take fictionl violence as norml and entertainment but it also bring insecurity and aggessiveness in young and aged people .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and give a personal position, stating that the effects depend on “age, mindset and the area where people are living.” The essay also offers relevant reasons: adults may watch violent fiction for entertainment, while children may become more fearful or aggressive. However, the discussion is only partially developed. The first view is supported mainly by repeated claims that people watch with friends or in their free time, rather than explaining why fictional content is harmless. The second view has clearer consequences, but the example about children joining fights is asserted rather than illustrated or explained. Make your opinion more consistent and develop each side with a specific, relevant example and clearer reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion. “On the other hand” clearly signals the shift to the opposing argument, and examples are placed alongside the relevant points. However, progression within paragraphs is limited, and several ideas repeat rather than build on one another—for example, the first body paragraph repeatedly says that people watch violence as entertainment. Some links are awkward or unclear, such as “another reason that why it is harmless,” while the conclusion introduces “young and aged people” without clearly summarising the earlier distinction. Organise each paragraph around one main claim, then explain its cause or effect before giving an example; use referencing and transitions more precisely.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Your vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the main topic, with relevant terms such as “fictional violence,” “aggressiveness,” “insecurity,” and “entertainment source.” However, the range is limited and several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, which sometimes makes the meaning harder to follow. For instance, “they become insecre about their safety” and “more participant in fights” do not express the intended ideas clearly; “less emotion” is also imprecise in this context. Spelling errors such as “deopends,” “aggessiveness,” and “fictionl” further reduce accuracy. Build a more precise set of topic-related phrases and check spelling, word forms, and collocations during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including a conditional structure in “if children see violence on television they will become more participant in fights.” However, the range is limited, and complex sentences are often faulty. Errors in articles and sentence construction appear in “an harmless entertainment” and “presented in the television”; verb forms are inconsistent in “we went to cinema” and “they loved in doing so.” There are also agreement and punctuation problems, including “it also bring insecurity” and several run-on sentences where full stops or commas are needed. These recurring errors can make the reader pause. Practise accurate past and present forms, subject–verb agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries before adding more complex structures.

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