Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

According to some people, the fakely created violence portrayed on television is just for entertainment and does not affect their life, while, other considered it as a encouragement to abusive behaviour in the society. I personally agree with that.

On the one hand, lot's of people considered the violent fiction as entertainment. Also,in fact it is all fake scenarios created by some production house. Actors earn money by persuing that kind of acting. In addition, It gives a thriller and suspicious emotional experience to the viewer. For example, In marvel studio's movie "avengers endgame" Thanos killed lots of charactors but people still enjoyed that movie a lot. Considering a thriller experience.

On the other hand, there are many people who considered it as a encouragement to violence. Because of the extreme scenes and the abusiveness within it. It can create a negative effects on young people. Also, it can affect the mental health and create anxiety to chrildren. By watching abusive content on television from early age can lead the younger generation towards the emotionless behaviour as well as can affect the social environment. These are the negative effect of fictional violence on people.

To conclude, however, this is a harmless entertainment and considered as a emotional experience. It can lead a generation towards a emotionless behaviour or can affect the mental health people. Its disadvantages outweight the advantages. I personally think that it encourages to violent behaviour.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both views and state your position in the introduction and conclusion: you see fictional violence as potentially harmful, despite its entertainment value. The Avengers example gives some support to the harmless-entertainment view, and you identify possible effects on children, including anxiety and emotional detachment. However, these points remain limited and are not explained in enough detail; for instance, you do not show how viewing fictional violence might lead to real behaviour. Your own opinion is also expressed briefly rather than developed with reasons or a specific example. The response is 12 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to develop the discussion. Add explanation and evidence for both sides, then make your position more fully reasoned.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. The signposts “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “To conclude” help readers follow the basic organisation. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear or repetitive. For example, the first body paragraph moves from the claim that the violence is fictional to actors earning money, without clearly connecting that point to why viewers consider it harmless. The fragment “Considering a thriller experience” also interrupts the example. Some linking is mechanical, and punctuation around transitions is inconsistent. Develop each paragraph around one main claim, explain how each supporting point relates to it, and use clearer references and transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “fictional violence,” “thriller,” “mental health,” and “social environment,” so the reader can understand the general discussion. However, the range is limited and several inaccurate word choices or forms make the writing less natural, such as “fakely created,” “a encouragement,” “suspicious emotional experience,” and “emotionless behaviour.” Spelling errors such as “charactors,” “chrildren,” and “outweight” are also noticeable. These issues sometimes make the intended meaning harder to follow, particularly when describing the effects of television violence. Build a more precise set of topic phrases and check spelling and collocations; for example, describe a film as “fictional” or “staged,” and an effect as “emotional distress” rather than a “suspicious emotional experience.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some complex sentence forms, including a contrast in the opening sentence and the conditional idea “It can create a negative effects on young people.” However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. Examples include “other considered it” and “people considered” where the verb forms do not fit the intended meaning, as well as article and agreement problems in “a encouragement” and “a negative effects.” The sentence beginning “By watching abusive content…” does not connect its opening phrase clearly to the subject that follows, and “can affect the mental health people” is incomplete. Use shorter, controlled sentences first, then add complex structures with accurate subjects, articles, and verb forms. Proofread punctuation and sentence boundaries as well.

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