Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-19
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Voilent behaviour is one of the biggest challenge of our time. Some people believe that fictional violence portrayed on television is the harmless entertainment.While some people really thinks that it helps people to encourages violent behaviour.In this eassy we will discous both views that are fictional violence and violent behaviour.
On the one hand,there are strong reasons to believe that televisons fiction is innocuous. Firstly, viewers are geenrally mature to understand what is fictional and what is reality. They understand the fight scenes involve actors, special effors and scripts. Moreover, sich content can serve as a form of stress relief.After a long day,many people enjoy watching action films or crime dramas to unwind, without any intention of imitating what they see.
On the other hand, there is compelling evidence that fictional violence can have detrimental effect, espacially on impressionable audience. Constant exposure to aggresive scene can desensties individuALS, MAKING THEM LESS SENSTIVE to
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
You introduce both views and begin to explain them: the first side is supported by the idea that viewers recognise acting and scripts, while the second mentions desensitisation. However, the response addresses the task only partially. The opposing argument stops mid-sentence at “making them less sensitive to,” so its consequence is not explained, and there is no conclusion or clear statement of your own opinion. The opening also promises to discuss the issue but does not establish your position. The response is 153 words, below the required 250, which leaves the ideas substantially under-developed. To improve, complete both arguments with relevant examples, state your view clearly, and finish with a conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction is followed by paragraphs beginning “On the one hand” and “On the other hand.” These signposts help readers identify the two perspectives, and the first body paragraph develops its point in a sensible sequence, from viewers recognising fiction to entertainment as stress relief. However, the overall progression is incomplete because the final paragraph ends abruptly and there is no concluding paragraph to bring the discussion together. Some linking is also mechanical, and spacing around punctuation is inconsistent. Develop a complete paragraph for each view, then add a conclusion that states your position; use linking phrases to show relationships between ideas rather than relying mainly on formulaic transitions.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You attempt some topic-appropriate vocabulary, including “innocuous,” “impressionable audience,” “detrimental effect,” and “stress relief.” These choices show an effort to go beyond basic wording. However, spelling errors are frequent and sometimes make the text harder to read, as in “Voilent,” “eassy,” “discous,” “geenrally,” and “desensties.” There are also inaccurate or awkward word forms and collocations, such as “fictional violence is the harmless entertainment” and “aggressive scene.” The unfinished phrase “less sensitive to” further prevents the intended meaning from being completed. Proofread spelling carefully and learn vocabulary in accurate phrases, for example “fictional violence as harmless entertainment” and “aggressive scenes.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You use some simple and complex sentence forms, including the contrastive opening “While some people…” and the explanation beginning “After a long day…”. The first body paragraph is generally understandable, but grammatical errors are frequent across the response. Examples include subject–verb agreement in “Some people really thinks,” the incorrect infinitive pattern “helps people to encourages,” and article use in “is the harmless entertainment.” The opening “While some people…” is also a fragment because it is not joined to a main clause. Punctuation and spacing around sentence boundaries are inconsistent, and the final sentence is incomplete. Practise complete sentences, agreement, articles, and verb patterns, then check each sentence for a clear subject and main verb.
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