Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is believed by few people that the visual violence potrayed on tele-films is just an entertainment than some argues that it encourages ill - behaviours in the society.

On the one hand , thoughts for harming oneself is seen to be the negative effect comes from the violence shown on television because such injurious violence presented by entertainment industry may influence majority and could bring many harmful thoughts one can practically try to attempts when feel helpless or depressed. The things human are exposed to left them with medium of easy access for destructing oneself or others. For instance, indian movie "3 idiots" displayed how a student attempted sucide by jumping from high-rise building because of failing in exams represented the self violence happening nowadays, every next day.

On the other hand, Action and violence is believe to be one of the main component of entertainment although fictional and may or may not relate to real life perhaps watching such violence with range of high blasted sounds , bold and energetic characters in a extreme surrounding brings a peace of joy and evoke positive energy. For example, Pakistani militarian drama "ehd - e - wafa" potrayed the soldiers life in battle field with the bleeding injuries and martyed soldiers all around gave an encouraging message of bravery in an entertaining way.

In conclusion , fictional violence may evoke harmful thoughts perhaps could be an effective way of experience things which seems unreal. In my opinion, media should display such violence with optimistical moral highlights inorder to evolve society in becoming a peaceful ground rather than threatening zone.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and give a position in the conclusion: fictional violence may be harmful, but it can also communicate a positive message when presented responsibly. The examples of *3 Idiots* and *Ehd-e-Wafa* are relevant and help illustrate the two sides. However, the discussion is only partly developed. The first body paragraph focuses mainly on self-harm, so it does not fully explain how fictional violence might encourage violence towards others; the second paragraph’s claim that action scenes bring “peace of joy” and “positive energy” also needs clearer reasoning. Your opinion about showing violence with moral highlights is present, but its implications could be explained more directly. Develop each view with a clearer cause-and-effect explanation and make your position consistent throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting contrasting views, and a conclusion. “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” make the overall direction easy to follow. However, some links between ideas are unclear or mechanical. For example, the sentence beginning “The things human are exposed to” does not clearly connect its claim about exposure to the example that follows, and the long sentence about violence in entertainment combines several points without a clear progression. The conclusion also introduces the idea of violence as “an effective way of experience things” without explaining how it follows from the body paragraphs. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example explicitly to the point it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “fictional violence,” “injurious,” “high-rise building,” and “moral highlights,” and the examples show an effort to express nuanced ideas. However, the range is limited by frequent inaccurate word choice, spelling, and collocation, which sometimes make meaning difficult to follow. Phrases such as “thoughts for harming oneself,” “a peace of joy,” and “militarian drama” are not natural in this context; “suicide,” “portrayed,” and “martyrdom” are also misspelled or incorrectly formed in places. These issues reduce precision even when the general idea can be inferred. Build a bank of natural phrases for discussing media effects, such as “influence viewers’ behaviour” and “provide a positive message,” and check spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses with “because,” “although,” and “when,” but control is inconsistent. Errors in sentence structure and agreement appear in examples such as “the negative effect comes from the violence” and “Action and violence is believe to be one of the main component.” The sentence beginning “The things human are exposed to left them” also has problems with its subject and verb construction, while the long sentence about entertainment and “positive energy” is difficult to parse. These errors sometimes make the intended relationships between ideas unclear. Practise building accurate sentences around one main clause, then add a subordinate clause; check subject–verb agreement, articles, and verb forms before combining several points.

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