Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

Television is source of entertainment . Many people like TV in those days . But modern lifestyle made TV a useless thing . But many people use TV in those days .We use TV for many purposes . For example we watch dramas , games , apps use for many purposes . But nowadays people use mobile phones for all things. Moderniazation have change the point of view ,they donot use TV . We know that technologies create many problems for human beings . Like harmful radiations effect our eyes and skin in a bad way . But people use iphone and many other devices . Violence is a bad thing . People adopt those habits which they seen in movies . Many children learn habits from cartoons . I Think voilence in not good.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response recognises that television can entertain and that viewers, especially children, may imitate behaviour seen on screen. The point that “Many children learn habits from cartoons” is relevant to the concern about influence. However, the essay does not discuss both views in a balanced way: it gives little explanation of why fictional violence might be harmless entertainment, and it does not clearly develop the argument that it encourages violent behaviour. The final statement, “I Think voilence in not good,” expresses a view but does not answer the question with a reasoned position. The response is also 115 words below the required minimum, leaving too little space to address and support the task’s main parts. Develop each view with reasons and a relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.0

There is a basic sequence of ideas, moving from television as entertainment to modern devices and then to violence and children’s behaviour. Some linking words, including “But,” “For example,” and “Like,” show an attempt to connect points. However, the progression is difficult to follow because several sentences about television, mobile phones, and technology do not clearly support the discussion of fictional violence. Repeated use of “But” also makes the connections feel mechanical, while the response has no clear paragraph structure to separate the two views and the writer’s opinion. Group related ideas into paragraphs and use explicit transitions such as “On the one hand” and “On the other hand.”

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small set of relevant words, including “entertainment,” “violence,” “habits,” and “radiations,” so the general topic is usually identifiable. It also attempts to refer to modern technology and children’s media. However, vocabulary is repetitive and often imprecise: “use TV for many purposes” and “all things” do not explain the intended meaning, while “learn habits” is vague in this context. There are also spelling errors such as “Moderniazation,” “donot,” and “voilence,” which reduce accuracy. Build a more specific vocabulary for discussing media effects, such as “portray,” “imitate,” and “desensitise,” and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The writing mainly uses short, simple statements, with a few attempts to join ideas using “but” and “for example.” This makes the basic meaning partly accessible, but there is little variety in sentence structure and limited control of longer sentences. Errors include missing or incorrect articles in “Television is source,” subject–verb agreement and verb form in “Moderniazation have change,” and the construction “those habits which they seen.” Punctuation and spacing are also inconsistent, with spaces before full stops and commas. Practise accurate basic sentence patterns first, then combine related ideas using clauses such as “Although some viewers see this as entertainment, children may imitate what they watch.”

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