Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Violence scenes are very common in TV and entertainment shows with no harmful effects whereas, other people argue that it has the huge side effects on people's brain. Although I believe that, individuals are taking these entertainment for fun but excessive exposure of such films can influence people.

From the one perspective, in this educated society, people can differentiate between fictional programs and real life. The main reason for this is, individuals are just watching films and TV entertainment for fun. For example, in films young people can easily extract the ideas that hero is struggling and fighting with villein to save an innocent person. In addition they pursue the idea that all the activities are imaginary and based on fiction.

From another perspective, this issue is particularly concerning that, an excessive exposure of such kind of entertainment full of violence can impact on children's brain and it affect their personality. The reason is that, adults brain easily adopt these actions. For example, during play children mostly

use aggressive behaviour as they seen in cartoons and other movies. As a result they imagine, showing extreme behaviour can solve the complicated tasks of life. Children can achieve their goal through certain type of moods and activities.

In conclusion, this fictional violence can impact people in different ways. Some people adopt certain habits easily but others only take it for granted. We can prevent such kind of activities by monitoring the programs that are in the children's playlist. Molding adults attention inm a positive way can bring change in society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You discuss both views: the first body paragraph argues that viewers can distinguish fiction from reality, while the second explains how violent programmes may affect children. Your conclusion also gives a practical response through parental monitoring. However, your own position is not fully clear or consistently developed. The opening says you believe people watch for fun but that exposure can influence them, while the conclusion says people respond differently without clearly stating which view you find more convincing. Several points remain general: for example, the claim that children think extreme behaviour solves life’s problems needs a more specific explanation or example. State your judgement directly and support each side with clearer, more developed reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two perspectives, and a conclusion. Phrases such as “From the one perspective” and “From another perspective” help signal the discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the example about children’s play is followed by claims about imagining extreme behaviour and achieving goals, but the links between these ideas are not made clear. Some transitions are also mechanical, and the conclusion introduces monitoring and “Molding adults attention” without smoothly connecting these suggestions to the argument. Use clearer topic sentences, develop one point at a time, and make references such as “these actions” and “such kind of activities” more precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “fictional,” “excessive exposure,” “aggressive behaviour,” and “monitoring,” and you attempt some less common expressions. However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or awkward, which can make meaning less clear. For instance, “huge side effects on people’s brain” is not a natural way to describe the possible influence, and “adults brain easily adopt these actions” appears to confuse adults with children. “Villein” is also the wrong word for the intended character; “villain” is needed. Aim for accurate, natural combinations such as “affect children’s behaviour” and “imitate aggressive actions,” and check spelling and word forms before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a concession in “Although I believe…” and a conditional idea about exposure influencing people. However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to interpret. Examples include “Although I believe that, individuals are taking these entertainment,” where the clause and verb form are not correctly connected, and “it affect their personality,” which has a subject–verb agreement error. Commas also interrupt clauses in places such as “The reason is that, adults brain…” and “this issue is particularly concerning that, an excessive exposure…”. Practise building complete clauses, checking agreement and articles, and using punctuation to separate ideas accurately.

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