Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In my opinion, the fictional violence portrayed on television can be harmful for some people and can not be harmful to some individual. It depends upon various factors such as age, gender, religion of the individual, there for i would say it can harm to some people l.

The fictional violence may cause negative impact on the people's who are in early teenage and to those who try to learn or try to copy the behavior of actors on television. It can directly impact their behavior towards society and to other people around them and it also promote the crime because those people also try to act like the actor in tv and think that violence is the symbol of superior. It also harmful to the childrens aged between 5 to 12, because they also learn various behavior from other in that age and try to copy the act, the language, the tone so ot also put them into negative growth.

But there are other people who are in their middle age or over, who understand the real world and the reel world. they can differentiate between what us right and what us wrong so the effect of violence might very among people.

Though the fictional violence might be harmful for tge children's and teenage girls and boys, government should regulate the movies and reelsm Proper regulations and rules such as age restriction can play crucial role in reducing the negative impact of the violence act in the television.

Overall, the fictional violence portrayed in television that also encourage violence behavior but it depends on various factors on the other hand we can use these acts as entertainment too.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and give a position: fictional violence may affect some viewers negatively, while others can distinguish fiction from reality, and you conclude that it can also be entertainment. The examples about teenagers and children copying actors are relevant and explain one reason for concern. However, the opposing view is less fully developed: the point that adults can distinguish “the real world and the reel world” is asserted rather than supported with a reason or example. Your opinion also shifts between saying it “can be harmful” and that it “depends,” so state your position more decisively and explain the factors that matter. The discussion of age restrictions is relevant, but could be linked more clearly to both views.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph explaining possible harm, a contrasting paragraph about adults, and a concluding recommendation. Connectors such as “But,” “Though,” and “Overall” help signal changes in direction. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and several ideas are joined in long sentences with repeated “and” or “also.” The opening repeats the idea that violence may or may not be harmful without clearly setting out the two views. References such as “those people” and “these acts” are not always precise, so readers must infer what they refer to. Use clearer topic sentences, separate distinct points, and make each paragraph develop one side before moving to your conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “fictional violence,” “negative impact,” “age restriction,” and “regulate,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and some word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which makes parts of the argument awkward or unclear. For example, “promote the crime” and “violence is the symbol of superior” do not express the intended ideas naturally; “encourage crime” and “a sign of power” would be clearer. There are also spelling errors such as “childrens,” “ot,” and “tge,” alongside informal wording such as “tv.” Aim for more precise phrases and check spelling, word forms, and collocations during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses beginning “because” and “though,” and the overall meaning can usually be followed. However, some errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and punctuation reduce accuracy. For instance, “the people's who are” has an unnecessary possessive form, while “it also promote” does not agree with its subject. In “they can differentiate between what us right and what us wrong,” the embedded clauses are incorrectly formed. The opening also contains a run-on sequence of ideas joined by commas. Practise building shorter, complete sentences first, then combine them with accurate subordinate clauses. Check subject–verb agreement and punctuation when editing.

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