Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the modern age where mobile phones and tv's rule the world, there is always a debate about fictional violence displayed on television is harmless entertainment. Some people agree to this statement others disaggre beleving it encourages violent behaviour. In the essay below there is a detailed explanation about whether it is harmless or encourages violent behaviour.

Firstly, the display of fictional violence is loved by many people whether they are adult or just a child. In the research about most loved genre there is always a place for movies including fictional violence. I personally belive it is really a great way of entertainment. People love this kind of movie and it gets prased all around the world even receving rewards such as oscar and best film of the year. One of the best way to remove boredom is to watch these movies.

On the other hand, watching this type of movie by a child could hamper their brain and encourage violent behaviour. Childerns who doesn't know about the fictional voilence could belive that it is reality and try to emmitate that type of violence. This may further lead to ruin a child's mental health. A Child who is grown watching these type of movies may often develop an violent character.

By comparing both of these views adults watching these movies for entertainment is fine but I belive they shouln't let their kids watch these genre. Rather than letting their kids watch Tv's the grown ups should let their kids play outside and have fun or if they really want to let their kids watch tv's or mobile phone they should put kids show.

Lastly, if a kid watches violent shows then his character could develope violent so the parents shouln't let their kids watch these kind of shows. Both of the opinions about fictional violence is true it may be harmless entertainment for adults whereas for kids it could encourage violent behaviout

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and give a clear personal position: fictional violence can entertain adults, while children should be protected from it. The discussion of children is more developed, with the explanation that they may mistake fiction for reality and imitate what they see. However, the case for harmless entertainment is mostly asserted through claims that people enjoy these films and that they receive awards; these points do not explain why fictional violence itself is harmless. The conclusion repeats the main contrast rather than drawing the discussion together, and the claim that both opinions are true is not fully reconciled with your own view. Develop each side with a specific reason or example and state your position consistently.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a concluding position. Transitions such as “Firstly” and “On the other hand” help signal the change in viewpoint. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes repetitive: the final paragraph repeats the warning about children already made in the previous paragraph, and the conclusion again restates the same point. Some links are mechanical or unclear, particularly “By comparing both of these views,” which does not clearly introduce the recommendation that follows. Organise each paragraph around one main claim, then explain and illustrate it, and use clearer references so the reader can follow how each point supports your overall position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “fictional violence,” “violent behaviour,” “entertainment,” and “mental health,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “loved genre,” “remove boredom,” and “develop an violent character.” Spelling errors—including “disaggre,” “belive,” “Childerns,” and “emmitate”—are noticeable and reduce the accuracy of the writing. Some wording is also repeated, especially “kids,” “movies,” and “violent behaviour.” Build a wider set of precise topic phrases and check spelling and collocations; for example, explain that children may “imitate aggressive behaviour” rather than using less natural phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional idea in “A Child who is grown watching these type of movies may often develop…” and a contrast between adults and children in the final body paragraph. However, control is inconsistent, and errors sometimes make sentences difficult to follow. Examples include “Some people agree to this statement others disagree,” which needs clearer sentence separation, and “Childerns who doesn't know,” where the subject and verb do not agree. There are also problems with articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries, as in “an violent character” and the comma splice in the opening. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and article use, and punctuate complete clauses carefully before attempting longer sentence patterns.

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