Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Undoubtedly, violence is a matter of considerable significance in today's world. Some people believe that fictional violence on T.V is harmless entertainment. While, others think that it promotes violent behaviour. This essay will discuss both sides before giving my own opinion.

On the one hand, fictional violence that shows on T.V offers several advantages. The main reason is that it shows people what to do in an emergencies. It not only entertain people but also prepare them for difficult situations. For example, the hollywood movie ' The Killer' is the prominent example in front of us. In this movie, how a victim saves his life with the help of fast running and reach back to his home safely. As a result, fictional violence entertainment helps people deal with danger in difficult situations. Therefore, this is understandable why some people support this view.

On the other hand, others argue that fictional violence encourages violent behaviour. Another reason is that it promotes different behaviours especially in children, when they see violent behaviour in movies they get influenced by their characters and try to become like them. For instance, a recent research shows that children who are more likely to watch slasher movies, they might become butchers in future because their source of entertainment affects their whole personality. Hence, violent behaviour in movies greatly affects an individual's personality. Moreover, others argument are also convincing.

To sum up, In my opinion I agree with latter view. Although, fictional violence on television is harmless but it affects greatly on people's personality.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and state a position, especially in the conclusion: “I agree with latter view.” The paragraph about children being influenced by violent characters is relevant, but the claim that viewers “might become butchers” is extreme and is not supported by the example beyond a vague reference to “a recent research.” The first view is also not fully explained: the idea that films teach people what to do in emergencies is asserted, while the example of a character escaping does not show clearly how this is useful to viewers in real life. Your conclusion then weakens your position by saying fictional violence “is harmless” while also agreeing that it affects personality. Develop each view with more credible support and make your final opinion consistent.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, separate paragraphs for each view, and a conclusion. Signposts such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “To sum up” help readers follow the discussion. However, some links are mechanical or do not express a clear relationship. For example, “Moreover, others argument are also convincing” adds little and is unclear, while “Hence” repeats the preceding claim rather than advancing the reasoning. The conclusion also creates a contradiction between agreeing with the latter view and calling fictional violence harmless. Improve progression by connecting each example directly to its claim, removing filler transitions, and ensuring the final paragraph follows logically from the discussion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “violent behaviour,” “promotes,” “influenced,” and “personality,” and the meaning is generally understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “considerable significance” and “prominent example.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward: “what to do in an emergencies,” “fictional violence entertainment,” and “others argument” do not sound natural. “Become butchers” is an imprecise and overly literal way to describe possible influence. Spelling and presentation also need attention, including “hollywood” and inconsistent spacing around “T.V.” Build accuracy by learning common collocations for media effects and choosing precise, measured language rather than dramatic claims.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex forms, including a relative clause in “children who are more likely to watch slasher movies” and a conditional idea in “when they see violent behaviour … they get influenced.” However, errors occur in several sentence patterns and sometimes make the meaning harder to follow. Examples include “While, others think” as an incomplete sentence, “it not only entertain” instead of a correctly formed verb, and “how a victim saves his life … and reach back,” where the verbs do not agree in form. There are also problems with articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries, as in “in an emergencies.” Practise building complete clauses and checking subject–verb agreement and verb forms, especially in longer sentences.

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