Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The table shows the number of fatal, serious and slight injuries resulting from gun and knife crime in Great Britain from 1998 to 2007 and the percentage increase for each degree of injury over the period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Great Britain - Gun and Knife Crime statistics - 1998-2007

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The tabular chart below shows the number of fatal, serious and slight injuries resulting from gun and knife crime in great britain from 1998 to 2007.

There are total three types of injuries namely: fatal, serious and slight and the fourth column is for total number of citizens who got injured.

The given data is of 10 years i.e; from 1998 to 2007.

In the first year from 1998 to 1999 49 citizens sufferred from fatal injury whereas in the same year 162 indiviuals sufferred from serious injury. meanwhile in the same year 653 of population faced a slight injury so in the given year 864 indiviuals sufferred from injuries.

In the next year 1999 - 2000 62 citizens suffered from fatal injuries whereas 200 faced a serious injury meanwhile 933 faced slight injury so during the given year 1195 citizens suffered from injuries. whereas in the 2000- 2001 72 people suffered from fatal injury, whereas 244 citizens suffered a serious injury meanwhile 1066 indivuals faced a slight injury the total number of citizens who suffered from an injury are is 1382.

The rest three years data we will discuss in upcoming paragraph :

In the next given year i.e; [redacted phone] 95 people suffered from fatal injury whereas 392 citizens suffered from a serious injury meanwhile 1390 indiviuals suffered from a slight injury so the count of citizens who suffered during 2001 to 2002 is 1877.

To conclude, there is 18% increase in fatal injuries whereas for serious injuries citizens increased and become 194 meanwhile the number of slight injured increased and become 405 other than this the total of citizens suffering thede injuries is 342.

To conclude the count of the slight injuries is the highest. but the count of fatal injuries is the lowest which comes out to be 18.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to provide a clear overview of the main trends. Instead of summarizing the data, you have listed individual years in a repetitive, mechanical fashion. The instructions require you to select and report main features and make comparisons, but you have focused on transcribing raw numbers. Furthermore, the conclusion is confusing and does not accurately reflect the data provided in the table. To improve, you should group the data by trends (e.g., identifying which injury type saw the most significant growth) rather than listing every year chronologically. The analysis of the percentage increases is also inaccurate and lacks clarity.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5

The essay lacks logical progression. The paragraphing is arbitrary, and the transition between paragraphs is weak, particularly the phrase 'The rest three years data we will discuss in upcoming paragraph', which is inappropriate for an academic report. Cohesive devices are used repetitively (e.g., 'meanwhile' is used excessively and often incorrectly). There is no clear structure to guide the reader through the data. To improve, use linking words to compare and contrast data points rather than simply listing them, and ensure each paragraph has a clear thematic focus.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary is very limited and repetitive. You rely heavily on basic phrases like 'suffered from' and 'number of citizens'. There is little attempt to use academic vocabulary or synonyms to describe trends (e.g., 'increased', 'rose', 'fluctuated'). Additionally, there are errors in word choice, such as 'tabular chart' (it is a table) and 'the rest three years data'. To improve, incorporate a wider range of vocabulary related to data description, such as 'witnessed a surge', 'remained stable', or 'a significant proportion'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('citizens sufferred'), punctuation (misuse of semicolons and lack of capital letters for 'Great Britain'), and sentence structure. Many sentences are run-on or lack proper coordination. The use of 'i.e;' is incorrect in this context. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, ensure proper capitalization of proper nouns, and practice using complex structures like relative clauses or passive voice to describe the data more professionally.

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