Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-26
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The table shows the number of fatal, serious and slight injuries resulting from gun and knife crime in Great Britain from 1998 to 2007 and the percentage increase for each degree of injury over the period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Great Britain - Gun and Knife Crime statistics - 1998-2007
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The given table illustrates the number of fatal,serious and slight injuries resulting from gun and knife crime in Britain country from 1998 to 2007 and the propertion increase for each degree of injury over the period.
From an overall point of view,it is clearly visible that in first year there is low percentage of total injury and in second last year there is large propertion of injured individuals.
Firstly, in [redacted phone] there is a 653 slightly injured and then propertion of slightly injured people increased up to 2005 and slightly decreased from there.This table shows the fluctuation at last point.
talking about fatal and serious injury fatal injured people was 49 in [redacted phone] and in [redacted phone]5.
fatal injured individuals was fluctuated till end..serious injured people are more than factual injured .In [redacted phone],there was only 162 serious injured people.in [redacted phone] there were no any serious injured people.from [redacted phone] serious i njured people were increasing continusely till [redacted phone] and it fluctuate at [redacted phone] and [redacted phone]6. The totral injured people was more in [redacted phone].
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response attempts to address the task but fails to provide a clear or accurate summary of the data. The overview is vague and does not highlight the main trends effectively. Furthermore, the data reporting is highly inaccurate; for example, stating there were 'no any serious injured people' in 2006-2007 contradicts standard data interpretation, and the figures cited (e.g., '653' for 1998-1999) do not clearly align with the provided table. The response lacks a logical selection of key features, and the confusion between years and categories makes the information difficult to follow.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5
The essay is poorly organized. While there is an attempt at paragraphing, the progression of ideas is disjointed. Cohesive devices are used in a mechanical and often incorrect way, such as 'talking about fatal and serious injury' which is an informal transition. Referencing is frequently unclear, and the lack of logical flow between sentences makes it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison of the data. The structure does not support a coherent summary of the information provided.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, often relying on basic terms like 'injured people' or 'increased'. There are frequent errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'propertion' (proportion), 'factual' (fatal), and 'continusely' (continuously). These errors, combined with the misuse of terminology, impede the reader's understanding. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to convey the data with the precision required for an Academic Task 1 response.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that often distort meaning. There is a lack of control over basic sentence structures, with many run-on sentences and missing articles (e.g., 'in first year', 'fatal injured people was 49'). Subject-verb agreement is inconsistent, such as 'fatal injured individuals was fluctuated'. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are almost always faulty. Punctuation is also problematic, with missing spaces after commas and periods throughout the text.
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