Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Concern for the environment is growing rapidly and more and more people are choosing to be 'eco-tourists' - travelling in responsible, environmentally-friendly ways. As a result, the eco-tourism industry is expanding.

To what extent do you think this is a positive trend?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

eco tourist it's an international trend that start with people choosing to travelling in some responsible environmentally friendly ways because the concern about the environment is growing rapidly more and more by the time and as a result the eco tourism is expanding and growing . for me it's a reasonable good trend because it make people aware the environment and our relationship with earth and fix it because for decads we've been ruining the earth health balance starting with the cars that poisoning the air and the same things for flights also poisoning the water and seas and oceans by big steamboats . it should for us the people are agree and encouraging the eco tourism culture and we make travelling is funny and good memories for us as tourists and at the same time we keep and guard the balance in our nature .in our earth .in our air and our raining. the international big foundations that are aware of the risk our earth and our bio environment are facing and make pressure on the countries and the united nations to make sure that everyone is looking for the best of our mother earth and the balance of our environment.and it also the mission of the united nations to make every country is putting and selecting strict laws about this .we are talking about laws that make everyone being good to our environment and make everyone happy for being one of the eco tourism community members .all this to make a win win deal .our environment kept good and balanced and we as tourists we keep our hobby as traveling

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You give a clear overall view that eco-tourism is a positive trend, especially when you say it can make people more aware of the environment and help protect nature. You also mention pollution from cars, flights and ships, and refer to international organisations and laws. However, the response only partially develops the task: these points are mostly asserted rather than explained with specific examples or clear cause-and-effect reasoning. The discussion of governments and the United Nations is also broad, and the final idea about preserving travel as a hobby is not fully connected to the argument. To strengthen your response, explain how responsible tourism reduces harm or benefits local communities, and support your position with a concrete example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has a recognisable central position and several related ideas, moving from environmental awareness to pollution and then to international action. However, the ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs, and the long sequence of points makes the overall progression difficult to follow. Connectors such as “and,” “because” and “as a result” are repeated, while some links between claims are unclear—for example, the move from environmental laws to tourists being happy. The repeated phrases about keeping the earth and environment balanced also add little progression. Organise the essay into an introduction, separate body paragraphs for distinct reasons, and a conclusion. Use clear topic sentences and refer back to each point with precise linking language.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “eco-tourism,” “environmentally friendly,” “polluting,” “strict laws” and “balance.” This shows an attempt to discuss environmental issues rather than relying only on very general language. However, the range is limited and several word choices or combinations are unnatural, which can make meaning harder to follow. For example, “earth health balance,” “big steamboats” and “our raining” do not express the intended ideas clearly; repeated use of “good” and “make” also limits precision. Aim to learn common collocations for this topic and choose exact terms for environmental impacts, such as emissions, marine pollution and conservation. Check spelling and word forms when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences using clauses such as “because the concern about the environment is growing” and “that make pressure on the countries.” This shows some effort to use more than short, simple statements. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence boundaries frequently make the message difficult to read. Examples include “people choosing to travelling,” “it make people aware,” and “the international big foundations … are aware … and make pressure.” Several sentences run together without clear punctuation, so the relationships between ideas become unclear. Practise building accurate sentences with one main idea at a time, then add subordinate clauses and check subject–verb agreement and verb patterns.

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