Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-09-21
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The charts below show the number of French adults whose parents spoke a French regional language to them when they were children and the number who speak a French regional language to their own children.
Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.
Number of adults (in thousands) whose parents spoke a regional language to them in childhood
Student answer (Band 4.5)
the bar chart illustrates the number of french adults whose parents spoke a french regional language to them when they were children and the number who speak a french regional scholars.
overall, it is evident that the number of mature in thousands. It is defined as five languages, including, Alsatian, accitan, breton, corsican.
Initially, the highest number in spoken habitually is accistan and alsatian, while both languages had similar value with 600 figures. Moreover, the lowest number is corcian with between 0 to 200 figures. Additionally, in spoken occasionally, the highest language is occitan stood at just between 1m to 1.2m. The lowest language is again corsican with between equal number.
Furthermore, in own children, the highest language is alsatian with had just near 400 number. Moreover, the lowest language is corsican accounted for approximatelly between 0 to 100 figures. Hencefore, occitan had nearly between 200 to 300 numbers.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5
The response is 149 words long, falling just short of the 150-word minimum requirement, which negatively impacts Task Achievement. Furthermore, the response suffers from significant mechanical copying errors from the prompt, such as ending the introduction with 'speak a french regional scholars' instead of 'speak it to their own children'. While the overview attempts to summarise the data, it uses vague phrasing like 'the number of mature in thousands' and omits Creole entirely from the list of languages. Some figures are mentioned, such as Alsatian and Occitan at 600, but data interpretation is frequently imprecise, referring to 'figures' and 'numbers' rather than clear quantities. Overall, the task is only partially addressed, leading to a band score of 4.5.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The text is organised into short paragraphs representing different parts of the data, but the overall progression is disjointed due to awkward phrasing and mechanical errors. Cohesive devices such as 'Initially', 'Furthermore', and 'Hencefore' are attempted, but their usage is often unnatural or inaccurate ('Hencefore' is misused). Referencing between sentences is frequently unclear, leaving the reader confused about which data points are being compared. Paragraphing is present, but the abrupt sentences and lack of smooth transitions prevent a clear logical flow throughout the report. This places the response firmly at Band 5.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
The lexical range is extremely limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic words like 'number', 'language', 'highest', and 'lowest'. There are numerous spelling and word-choice errors, such as 'accitan' instead of 'Occitan', 'breton' with a lowercase letter, 'corcian' for Corsican, and the nonsense phrase 'mature in thousands'. The student struggles with academic vocabulary and collocations, consistently referring to data points as 'figures' or 'numbers' rather than proportions or amounts. Lexical control is poor throughout, making it difficult for the reader to follow the intended meaning, thus warranting a band score of 4.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The grammatical structures attempted are largely limited to simple sentences and basic subject-verb constructions, many of which contain severe errors. Examples include 'while both languages had similar value with 600 figures', 'the highest language is occitan stood at just between 1m to 1.2m', and 'alsatian with had just near 400 number'. Attempts at complex structures are consistently faulty. Punctuation and capitalisation errors are also frequent, such as starting the entire response in lowercase. Due to the high frequency of grammatical errors that impede communication, the response achieves a band score of 4.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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