Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The ease of international travel and the spread of various kinds of mass media all over the world have made it more possible than ever for people to know how other people live in other countries.

Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

INTERNATIONAL TOURISM HAS INCREASINGLY BECOMING POPULAR NOWADAYS. IT IS BELIEVED THAT THE CONVENIENCE OF OVERSEAS TOUR AND THE POPULARITY OF NUMEROUS MASS MEDIA IN THE ENTIRE WORLD HAVE MADE IT FEASIBLE FOR PEOPLE TO GATHER INFORMATION ABOUT MASSES RESIDING IN OTHER COUNTRIES THAN EVER BEFORE. THEREFORE, THE ADVANTAGES OF THIS DEVELOPMENT OVERWEIGHS THE DISADVANTAGES THAT I SHALL DISCUSS IN THE UPCOMING PARAGRAPHS.

TO BEGIN WITH THE FOREMOST DISADVANTAGE IS THE UNRELIABLE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY MASS MEDIA THAT INFLUENCES VARIOUS AGE GROUPS PARTICULARLY TARGETTING TODAYS YOUTH. FOR EXAMPLE: ADVERTISEMENTS ON TELEVISIONS AND RADIOS LURES PEOPLE TO TRAVEL OVERSEAS, CHARGE EXTRA MONEY AND TRAP THEM. ADDITIONALLY, MANY PEOPLE TRIES TO MIMIC THE LIFESTYLE OF INTERNATIONALLY LIVING MASSES WITHOUT LOOKING INTO THEIR POCKETS, RESULTING INTO WASTAGE OF MONEY.

ON THE OTHER HAND, THERE ARE MANY ADVANTAGES THAT FACILITATES THE INDIVIDUALS TO LEAD A BETTER LIVING STANDARD. FIRSTLY, HUGE NUMBER OF INDIVIDUALS GET A CHANCE TO TRAVEL OVERSEAS THAT HELPS THEM TO BROADEN THEIR HORIZONS AND TO COMMUNICATE WITH OTHER PEOPLE. AS A RESULT THEY WILL LEARN ABOUT THEIR CULTURAL BACKGROUN DS AND CUISINES. SECONDLY, MASS MEDIA PLAYS A CRUCIAL ROLE IN ADVERTISING THE WAYS ADOPTED BY FOREIGNERS TO LIVE. FOR INSTANCE: CHANNEL SUCH AS TRAVEL HISTORY ON TELEVISION SHOWS DIFFERENT CULTURAL BACKGROUNDS. THIRDLY, MAGAZINES AND NEWSPAPERS INFLUENCES PEOPLE TO IMITATE THE FASHION SENSE FROM DIFFERENT COUNTRIES.TO EXEMPLIFY: PEOPLE ARE WEARING VARIETY OF CLOTHES ON DIFFERENT OCCASIONS.

TO CONCLUDE, INTERNATIONAL TOURISM AND MASS MEDIA HELPS THE PEOPLE TO KNOW ABOUT OTHER COUNTRIES AND THEIR CULTURES HOWEVER THEY ARE MISGUIDING THE PEOPLE AS WELL. THEREFORE, BOUNDARIES SHOULD BE MAINTAINED AND UNRELIABLE INFORMATION MUST BE AVOIDED .

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding the 'unreliable information' provided by mass media is mentioned but not fully explored with concrete, logical evidence. Similarly, the advantages are listed in a somewhat repetitive manner (e.g., mentioning travel, then media, then magazines). To reach a higher band, you should provide more depth to your arguments rather than listing multiple points. The conclusion is a bit brief and does not fully synthesize the points made in the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Additionally', and 'On the other hand'. However, some of these transitions feel mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. For example, the transition between the discussion of travel and the discussion of fashion in the third paragraph is abrupt. Additionally, the use of referencing is sometimes unclear, such as the phrase 'the ways adopted by foreigners to live', which is slightly awkward and impacts the overall flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, such as 'feasible', 'broaden their horizons', and 'cultural backgrounds'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and awkward collocations, such as 'masses residing in other countries' and 'looking into their pockets'. Furthermore, the use of 'masses' is not appropriate in this context. There are also minor spelling and punctuation errors, such as 'TODAYS' (missing apostrophe) and 'BACKGROUN DS' (extra space). To improve, focus on using more natural collocations and ensuring precise word choice.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues like 'many people tries' (should be 'try') and 'advertisements... lures' (should be 'lure'). There are also errors in verb tense and form, such as 'INTERNATIONAL TOURISM HAS INCREASINGLY BECOMING' (should be 'has increasingly become'). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and tense consistency.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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