Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-03
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
The ease of international travel and the spread of various kinds of mass media all over the world have made it more possible than ever for people to know how other people live in other countries.
Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In recent years communicational technology has become more advanced, as a result, access to international travel and distinct mass media has become commom such that gaining knowledge about the lifestyle of people across the globe is much easier than the past. Although for some this could feel as an intervention of privacy but it yields advantages that outweights the disadvantages.
To begin with, the critics of mass media expansion and foreign travel profess that these exercises intevenes and disturbes the life of common people. Often times there are customs and traditions that the locals people do not want to share with outsiders, mainly due to the fear of being trolled about. In addition to this, media representation could lure large amount of unwanted tourists. Many a times these visitors forget public etiqquates and pollute the peaceful environment of the city, thereby disturbing the residents. For instance social media is heavily criticized for attracting tourists and make the country filthy.
Even if all the disadvantages are accumulated they do not surpass the benifits it provides globally. Firstly, knowing about the standards of living of alternative country could help others break free from the old rigid ways of living. It could help people to gain insights on new way of thinking which could potentially broaden their intellectual horizons. Consequently, media advertisement is the most viable method to attract foreign travellers, because travelling direclty benifits the country by boosting the country's economy. Numerous country's economy heavily depends on their tourists so they use social media to lure travellers.
In conclusion, I believe that the extensive availability of tourism and mass media has improved the standard of living of people whilst providing a source of revenue to the country through promoting cross-culture communication. Although there are some drawbacks but they can be delt with goverment restrictions.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of international travel and mass media, presenting a clear position that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. For instance, the second paragraph touches upon cultural intrusion and unwanted tourists, such as 'visitors forget public etiqquates and pollute the peaceful environment,' but this point lacks sufficient supporting evidence or deep elaboration. Similarly, the advantages concerning alternative ways of living are mentioned but remain somewhat general. To reach a higher level, the ideas need to be more thoroughly extended and supported with specific examples and more nuanced reasoning throughout the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction and conclusion, and the writing is divided into logical paragraphs. Cohesive devices are employed to connect ideas, such as 'To begin with,' 'In addition to this,' and 'Firstly,' providing a clear progression of arguments. However, cohesion is at times mechanical or slightly faulty, and referencing can lack precision. For example, the transition between sentences in the second body paragraph could be smoother to link the notion of tourists making a country filthy back to the central theme of media exposure. To achieve a superior band, the management of cohesive devices needs to be more flexible and natural, ensuring seamless transitions between sentences and paragraphs.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The writer uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'intellectual horizons,' 'cross-culture communication,' and 'viable method.' However, there are notable spelling and word-choice errors that reflect a limited command of word forms and collocations, such as 'commom' instead of common, 'etiqquates' instead of etiquettes, 'benifits' instead of benefits, and 'delt' instead of dealt with. Additionally, phrasing like 'lure large amount' and 'alternative country' lacks precision. While these lexical errors do not seriously impede communication, they prevent the vocabulary score from rising, as more precision and control over less common lexical items are required for higher bands.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating structures such as conditional and concessive clauses like 'Although for some this could feel as an intervention of privacy but it yields advantages...' and 'Even if all the disadvantages are accumulated they do not surpass...'. There are, however, several grammatical and punctuation errors present, including run-on sentences with comma splices in the introduction, prepositional inconsistencies like 'feel as an intervention,' and subject-verb agreement issues such as 'intevenes and disturbes' and 'Numerous country's economy'. These errors rarely impede communication, but their presence alongside faulty complex structures keeps the grammatical accuracy and range at the current level. More consistent control over complex syntax and error-free sentences is needed to progress.
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