Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-07-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.
What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Nowdays in many global countries there are huge number of senior citizens who face a lack of challenges while finding a good job while they have a great experience . both the factors that surface as well as proactive steps that can be taken to solve the problems will be discussed further.
There are plethora of factors which induces this notion are primarily, there is major age discrimination where employees can prefer youngster where they believe young youth are more energetic and adaptable skills is very boost . Beside this , senior citizens have lack of technology upgradation skills as of technology is changing rapidly while they seek candidates more familiar with modern software and ai tools.
for example: a bank prefer candidates who know digital banking system.
On the other hand, various measures may be implemented to address the issues. Firstly, training and skill development the companies should have to provide training for citizens give them chance to learn a upgraded technology where free literacy digital course help them a lot .
Apart from this, company should recruit the candidates on the basis of skills not their age . moreover senior citizens have a more experienced then the youngsters . hence to exemplified: a bank can hired a senior manager for giving training and development session for their juniors which saves the bank time and cost as well.
To conclude, it is evident that older people face difficulties because of age discrimination mainly and this problem can be reduces through training programme .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: causes and solutions. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention age discrimination and technological gaps as causes, the explanation lacks depth. Similarly, the solutions—training and skill-based recruitment—are relevant but could be expanded with more specific examples or logical reasoning. The introduction is slightly confusing, as you mention a 'lack of challenges' when you clearly mean the opposite. To improve, ensure your main ideas are fully extended with clear, logical support rather than just listing points. The position is clear, but the overall development remains at a basic level.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices like 'Firstly', 'Apart from this', and 'To conclude', which provide a basic framework. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as 'hence to exemplified'. Additionally, the flow between sentences is occasionally interrupted by awkward phrasing or grammatical errors, which makes the progression of ideas feel a bit disjointed. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words more naturally and ensure that each sentence logically follows the previous one.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning. You attempt some topic-specific vocabulary like 'age discrimination', 'upgradation', and 'recruitment'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'global countries' (instead of 'countries worldwide'), 'young youth' (redundant), and 'technology upgradation skills'. Some phrases are also slightly unnatural, such as 'induces this notion'. To improve, focus on learning common collocations and using more precise terminology. Avoid repeating words and try to use a broader range of vocabulary to express your ideas more fluently.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'a bank prefer'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'a bank can hired'), and missing articles or prepositions. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing around commas and colons. While these errors do not completely prevent the reader from understanding your message, they are frequent enough to impact the overall quality of the writing. To improve, pay closer attention to basic sentence construction, verb tenses, and proofreading for small errors like missing articles.
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