Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-07-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 7.0)

It is undeniable that people over the age of fifty require the refreshing as well as calm environment for work. In this regard, it is widely acknowledged that in few nations, it can be challenging for them to get good jobs even if they have great experience, this essay will outline not only the factors which leads to this problem but also the initiatives to sort this.

To commence with, there are several causes of this trend. Firstly, many companies consider that age plays a key role in work performance. To elaborate, numerous organizations demands a young age because of many reasons related to physical and mental health. For example, when people gradually become older, it leads to the degradation of overall abilities, such as physical condition, reaction speed, and social skills - all of which are essential components in the workplace. Secondly, many bosses and supervisors are reluctant to employ elderly people because they lack creativity, making it difficult for them to stay updated with emerging trends and new information Even more importantly. To explain, due to their extensive work experience, they have their own opinions and regulations, making it not easy to control them. As a result, they do not hire people over fifty as they lacks many modern skills.

Nevertheless, there are some multifaceted practice which can deal with this challenge. the prime one is to implement a policy that companies cannot force applicants to reveal their age on their resumes. To exemplify, government can introduce a policy regarding age issues to the companies, so they cannot discriminate with elder workers or applicants. Therefore, it allows them to have equal opportunities with others. Another effective way is to hold vocational training programs that help older community learn the latest skills, such as AI, software, and social media, helping them gain a deep understanding of this era. Furthermore, reinforcing the connection with young people is also pivotal, as it can bridge the gap between them and foster a collaborative attitude in older people's minds.

In conclusion, although there are several causes of this issue yet government and public can take various measures such as making policy, starting vocational training programs to mitigate this complicated challenge.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, identifying both causes (age-related performance concerns and perceived lack of adaptability) and solutions (anti-discrimination policies and vocational training). The position is clear throughout. However, some ideas are slightly over-generalized, such as the claim that older people lack creativity or that their experience makes them difficult to manage. While the ideas are relevant, they could be developed with more nuanced examples to reach a higher band. The structure is logical, and the response effectively covers the requirements of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Cohesive devices are used throughout, such as 'To commence with', 'Nevertheless', and 'To exemplify'. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or awkward, such as 'Even more importantly' appearing at the end of a sentence. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the causes from the solutions. The progression of ideas is generally clear, though the flow between sentences could be smoother in the second paragraph to avoid a repetitive structure.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task. You use some topic-specific terms like 'vocational training', 'discriminate', and 'collaborative attitude'. There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'require the refreshing as well as calm environment' and 'multifaceted practice which can deal with'. Additionally, 'degradation of overall abilities' is a bit formal but fits the context. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding slightly unnatural phrasing to demonstrate a more sophisticated command of the language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('factors which leads', 'they lacks') and missing articles ('government can introduce', 'making it not easy'). Punctuation is generally functional, though some sentences are slightly run-on. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Increasing the variety of complex structures while ensuring subject-verb agreement and article usage would significantly improve your accuracy.

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