Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-07-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent years, it can not easy for individuals over the age of 50 to get good employment, despite their proficiency has become an increasingly common issue in many parts of the world. It has created several significant problems. This essay will discuss the main problems associated with this issue and suggest some effective solutions.

One of the main problem associated with older people their fitness. This is because some of the professional work requires strength and stamina. Consequently they have not enough physical strength and always get rejected from these jobs. Another significant issue is loss of memory. For example after 50 many people tend to forget things due to their older age. As a result in they do not fit in companies such it related and multinational companies.

To address these problems several measures can be taken. Firstly they have to maintain their body in such a good way to work in reputated organizations. This would be helpful for them to get better salary and incentives. Secondly for memory issue they have to must add plant-based vegetable diet in their food intake and do some mind related exercise. For instance one scientific research shows that regular plant-based vegetarian diet and mind related activities keeps people more active. As a result their life span increase day by day.

In conclusion, although it can be very difficult for people over the age 50 to get good jobs, despite their skills has created several serious problems. These issues can be effectively addressed through maintainig physical fitness and taking healthy diet food. Therefore, governments, organizations, and individuals should work together to implement these measures.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt (causes and solutions). However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and relies on generalizations. For instance, the claim that people over 50 are rejected due to a lack of physical strength or memory loss is a broad assumption that lacks nuance regarding the professional sector. While the solutions provided (fitness and diet) are relevant, they are somewhat simplistic and do not fully address the systemic or societal causes of ageism in the workplace. To improve, you should explore broader factors such as technological shifts or corporate bias, and provide more sophisticated solutions.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use basic cohesive devices like 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'In conclusion' to signal transitions. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the logical progression within paragraphs is occasionally hindered by grammatical errors. For example, the transition 'As a result in they do not fit' is awkward and disrupts the flow. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that referencing (e.g., 'these issues') is used more precisely to connect ideas across sentences.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on simple, repetitive phrasing such as 'good jobs', 'significant problems', and 'good way'. There are also some errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'reputated organizations' (should be 'reputable') and 'mind related exercise' (should be 'cognitive exercises'). To improve, try to incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary related to employment, such as 'age discrimination', 'professional development', 'workforce', or 'cognitive decline'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

There is a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. Frequent errors in basic grammar, such as 'it can not easy', 'despite their proficiency has become', and 'they have to must add', impede the clarity of your writing. Subject-verb agreement and preposition usage are also problematic throughout the text. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like missing verbs or incorrect verb forms.

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