Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often believed that it’s very hard to get good jobs by people over the age of 50, although they are experienced. There are several key reasons for this phenomenon; however, necessary step can be taken to mitigate this issue.

To begin with, the major reasons for this trend is lack of stamina. As people become older, it’s hard for them to perform well in their work because of lack of energy and get exhausted easily. Some of them are suffering from various comorbidities and have nutritional deficiencies. They get sick frequently and have to take sick leaves, which can create the shortage of workers in the working place.Consequently, managers mostly prefer to recruit younger people, as they are more energetic and can perform work more efficiently.

Another reason is, if the governments or organisations hire elderly workers, there would be more people that are eligible for receiving pension, which in turn create a financial burden for the government. Authority finds it impossible to allocate funds for the retired individuals, as there are other sectors too where they can invest.

In order to alleviate this issue, people could run a business instead of doing jobs in order to bare their expenses. Government should create new job opportunities for every age groups and hire old people in areas that lacks experienced workers.

In conclusion, people above 50 find it very ardous in seeking good jobs; however, instead of searching for jobs, they can start their own business and government should take part in creating more job vacancies.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: causes and solutions. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. The argument regarding 'lack of stamina' and 'comorbidities' is a generalization that lacks nuance, and the point about pension burdens is not clearly linked to the difficulty of hiring older workers. The solutions provided are brief and lack depth. To improve, you should provide more specific examples or logical explanations for your claims. For instance, instead of stating older workers lack energy, you could discuss the perception of technological adaptability or the cost of training versus experience. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments need more thorough exploration to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Consequently', and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader. However, the transition between ideas is sometimes mechanical. For example, the link between the pension argument and the hiring difficulty is weak. Additionally, there are some minor issues with referencing, such as 'the major reasons' (plural) followed by 'is' (singular). Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence flows naturally from the previous one will help improve the overall cohesion of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'mitigate', 'comorbidities', and 'arduous'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. For example, you use 'bare their expenses' (should be 'bear'), 'working place' (usually 'workplace'), and 'every age groups' (should be 'every age group'). These errors do not impede communication, but they indicate a need for more precise control over vocabulary. To move to a higher band, focus on using less common lexical items more accurately and paying closer attention to standard collocations in professional contexts.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'necessary step can be taken' (should be 'necessary steps'), 'the major reasons... is' (subject-verb agreement), and 'areas that lacks' (should be 'lack'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some missing articles and pluralization errors. The majority of your sentences are understandable, but the frequency of these minor errors prevents the writing from being considered error-free. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and article usage will significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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