Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-08-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.
What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Today,in some countries like Pakistan,Banglades,India people do not get jobs at the age of 50 because of no experience.As for the people who have experience also do not get jobs because of their age.In these countries people don't respect of 50 years old men and women.Also, people on the age of 50 do not work because their children works.In Pakistan,people over the age of 50 who have experience also do not get jobs because in my country these do not get respect and the people do not let them to work.They think that those people don't work actively because of their age.In fact,people over the age of 50 can work more actively than the young people because they have more experience.This is because of their old thoughts and un education.In my country people don't move on. They stuck at their old thoughts.Because of this my country do not progress.I think goverment have to open institute to aware people about the current affairs. Also goverment have to let 50 years old people to job.I think they are more intelligent than the young people.in other countries, like Germany ,UK,America, 50 years old people works because they have rights. In my country, no one have equal rights.People get jealous of each other and they don't let anyone to progress.Bill gates works t this age but why poor people can,t work despite their experiences.This problem can solve if people awares about rights,current issues and don't get jealous.In conclusion, in my opinion people at the age of 50 can work. Goverment should have to open institute to aware people. so that they can happy,relax,comfortable in their lives
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt—causes and solutions—but the development is limited and repetitive. The ideas regarding cultural attitudes and government intervention are relevant, but they lack depth and specific supporting evidence. The argument relies heavily on personal opinion and anecdotal observations about specific countries rather than a balanced, analytical approach. The position is clear, but the lack of sophisticated development and the tendency to over-generalize about societal attitudes limit the score. To improve, you should expand on your points with more detailed explanations or hypothetical examples that illustrate the broader global context of the issue.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay lacks a clear paragraph structure, which makes the progression of ideas difficult to follow. While there is an attempt to organize the response, the lack of clear topic sentences and the absence of effective cohesive devices (such as 'furthermore', 'consequently', or 'in contrast') make the flow feel disjointed. Referencing is often unclear, and the transition between the causes and the proposed solutions is abrupt. To improve, you should organize your essay into distinct paragraphs: one for causes, one for solutions, and a clear introduction and conclusion. Using a wider range of linking words will help guide the reader through your arguments more effectively.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, often relying on simple phrasing such as 'do not get jobs' and 'people'. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'un education' instead of 'lack of education' and 'aware people' instead of 'raise awareness'. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the range is insufficient to express complex ideas with precision. To improve, you should focus on learning collocations related to employment and social issues, and practice using more academic synonyms to avoid repeating the same words throughout the text.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'children works', 'no one have'), missing articles, and incorrect sentence structure. There is a limited range of sentence structures, with most sentences being simple or containing basic errors in punctuation and capitalization. Complex structures are rarely attempted, and when they are, they often contain errors. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles. Additionally, practice combining simple sentences into more complex ones using relative clauses or subordinating conjunctions.
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