Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this era, It is highly debatable that finding job in 50s is difficult. I highly believe there are certain aspects like, closeness to retirement and ability to perform physical task can affect the chances of landing good jobs. I will discuss potential causes and solutions in following paragraphs.

First and foremost reason is being in older in age will trigger possibility of early retirements despite of having relevant experience. Fear of early retirement and need of second hiring process will always cross employer mind when considering potential older employee. Second reason can be adaption to new technology. Although, good number of experience will be tempting while hiring individual in age of 50, it is undoubtable that people can be too set in their own ways and not willing to adapt to new technology.

To remedies the cause, there are certain available solutions for employers such as setting up correct expectations in hiring process and setting mandatory experience Whitin company for certain pension programmers, early onboarding trainings for adaptation to internal tools and technology. Providing additional clarification and reviewing criteria with HR and recruitment team will be potential solution for early retirements. Setting up clear onboarding training modules and documents can be effective to create potential learning environment for older individuals.

To put in nutshell, In lieu of having greater risk of landing job in difficult market, having number of years of experience can be highly handy in finding jobs as it provides in dept knowledge in field. Although it can be difficult, employers should take necessary steps to remedies the situation.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: causes and solutions. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the point about 'adaption to new technology' is mentioned but not fully explored with specific examples. The solutions provided, such as 'mandatory experience within company for certain pension programs', are slightly vague and could be more clearly linked to the specific problem of ageism. While the position is clear throughout, the essay would benefit from more detailed explanations and concrete examples to reach a higher band score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'First and foremost', 'Second reason', and 'To put in nutshell'. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'To remedies the cause'. The referencing is generally clear, but the flow between sentences could be smoother. The paragraphing is appropriate, though the final paragraph is quite brief and does not fully synthesize the preceding arguments.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks sophistication. There are several instances of awkward phrasing or incorrect word choices, such as 'In this era, It is highly debatable that finding job in 50s is difficult' (which contradicts the prompt) and 'In lieu of having greater risk'. Some terms are used repetitively, and there is a lack of precise, academic collocations. While the meaning is generally clear, the range of vocabulary is limited, preventing a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, including missing articles ('finding job', 'in age of 50'), incorrect verb forms ('To remedies the cause'), and punctuation issues. Some sentences are grammatically unstable, such as 'Fear of early retirement and need of second hiring process will always cross employer mind'. These errors occur throughout the text, though they do not typically impede the reader's ability to understand the main points.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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