Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In few states,it is significantly unfavourable for the people exceeding the age of 50 to attain their desired job although they have substantial experience.

From my perspective,there are many causes of it. As a person get old ,his mental competence cannot fulfill the need of that particular job.

After crossing this age ,individuals suffer from many diseases such as demantia , alzhiemer and parkinson where it was not possible for the company to manage such kind of issues .

The other reason was the lack of sufficient job in some countries so hiring companies usually prefer the ones who have greater work capacity and can stick to occupied schedule.

I firmly believe that such kind of problems could be solved by giving immense pension amount to such people .

The government should built variety of recreational places where they can spend their leisure time .but on the other hand the policy makers should impose the law to remove such kind of restrictions.

.If a person is physically and mentally fit ,he should allowed to work freely irrespective of his age .In addition ,more job should be created so that both youth and aged people should have equal opportunities to play their rule in any organization,.

More importantly other than this government should provide every possible facility to the senior citizen of the country as they have spent substantial period of their life in serving their country.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt—causes and solutions—but the development is limited. The ideas regarding health issues like 'dementia' and 'Alzheimer' are somewhat stereotypical and lack nuance, bordering on over-generalization. Furthermore, the response falls short of the 250-word minimum requirement, which negatively impacts the depth of the argument. While the position is clear, the supporting evidence is thin, and the essay lacks the necessary elaboration to reach a higher band. To improve, you should expand on your points with specific examples or logical explanations rather than listing potential health issues as a primary cause for unemployment.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the flow between ideas is somewhat mechanical. Transitions such as 'The other reason was' and 'More importantly other than this' are used, but they feel repetitive and lack sophistication. The paragraphing is present, but the logical progression within paragraphs is weak. For instance, the transition from discussing health issues to job availability is abrupt. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that links back to the main argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is adequate for basic communication but lacks the precision and range required for a higher band. There are several spelling errors, such as 'demantia' and 'alzhiemer', and some awkward phrasing like 'immense pension amount'. The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, relying on basic descriptors. To improve, try to incorporate more academic collocations and ensure accurate spelling of technical or medical terms. Avoid using overly informal or imprecise language when discussing complex social issues.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Examples include 'As a person get old', 'where it was not possible', and 'he should allowed to work'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas and periods. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors suggests a lack of control over complex structures. Focus on subject-verb agreement and passive voice construction to improve accuracy.

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