Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the contemporary era, many people believe that it is really challenging for elderly people to secure a good job, in spite of having enough experience. From my perspective it is one of main problems that older aged people are facing now a days. This essay will discuss regarding the root causes of this problem, and will try to give probable solutions.

First and fore most, this problem is more prominent in the developed countries, rather than developing or least developing countries. One of the core reason is that in many developed countries AI is replacing human roles in many sectors. For instance, it was necessary to have cleaners in every offices , which now can be done by AI robots. Another prime example is when we call to a office first 30 seconds to 60 seconds can easily handled by AI prompts. Consequently older employees are not required, thigey are experienced enough to handle this kind of job. Moreover, increasing number of modern technologies are taking over on experienced employees. Such as, usages of CCTV camera is another good example of it.

There are many steps can be taken by the higher authority, especially by the government. For instance, instead of introducing driverless cars, government should give more priority to the experienced drivers. On the other hand, restaurants should not encourage the using of robots, rather they give more opportunities to the human beings. In developed countries like China currently using robots in border areas , this is another core example of why experienced people are losing day by day.

To sum up, i would like to say that people's live are more valuable rather than making more profit. Thus, government should emphasizing more on creating sufficient amount of opportunities for human first, then they should find new ways to integrate technologies to improve the overall efficiency.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: causes and solutions. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument that AI replaces human roles is a relevant point, but the examples provided (cleaners, CCTV) are not fully explored in relation to the specific challenges faced by those over 50. The solutions proposed, such as banning driverless cars or robots in restaurants, are simplistic and lack a nuanced understanding of economic or technological progress. To reach a higher band, you should provide more sophisticated reasoning and concrete evidence that directly links the age factor to the employment difficulties discussed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression from the introduction to the causes and then the solutions. You use some cohesive devices like 'First and foremost', 'Consequently', and 'To sum up'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as the transition 'On the other hand' which does not effectively contrast the previous point. Additionally, some sentences lack smooth flow, and the referencing is occasionally unclear. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, unified focus will enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'contemporary era', 'developed countries', and 'integrate technologies'. However, there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'older aged people', 'thigey' (a typo), and 'people's live are more valuable'. The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on basic descriptors. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding repetitive phrasing, while ensuring that your spelling is accurate throughout the text.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow of reading. Examples include 'There are many steps can be taken', 'the using of robots', and 'government should emphasizing'. These errors in subject-verb agreement, article usage, and verb forms are noticeable. While you attempt to use complex structures, they are often faulty. To achieve a higher score, you need to focus on consistent control of basic grammar, particularly verb tenses and sentence construction, and aim for a higher frequency of error-free sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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