Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-08-25
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.
What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
A few several countries, that can be very hard challenging for individuals over the age of 50 to get a good jobs, In this essay shows their experience, Or opinions to tell causes of this problem and solutions.
Firstly, A few causes of this problem, It has difficult to find a good job over the age not a good stamina in human, at this age they are experienced in his work, but they are slow to our work and owners of the corporation find those people they work fast and little age such as 20 to 30 years old. after this age people mindset change and laziest to our wok. For instance, In 2020 turkey in local city that are published job for those people, at the age of above approximately 50 years old, Scientific research shows that work at this age of people more laziest, work should complete for 6 days because worker age is higher, On the other hand they get jobs for boasted people such as, 20 to 30 years old they complete their work in 3 days.
Secondly, some solutions that are good for over age people, they can do easy work such as accounting, do not take physical job like field job is to hard, government should provide easy jobs and provide monthly pay for those type of people. Children should take responsibility for his parents, at this age give rest to their parents. Only they can provide little work, that they will complete at their time. For instance, In my neighborhood they have different problems at this age such as bones weak, thinking of mind is slow, they will find those jobs easy to work or not a field job, provide a accounting job, and casher job only.
In conclusion, At the age of 50s they will find casher job not a field job because in this age lose of body stamina, they will find easy job such as casher job, accounting job not a physical job.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt—causes and solutions—but the development is weak and often repetitive. The ideas regarding 'stamina' and 'laziness' are presented as generalizations without clear logical support, and the examples provided (such as the reference to Turkey in 2020) are vague and lack sufficient detail to illustrate the point effectively. The position is somewhat clear, but the arguments are not fully extended, leading to a superficial treatment of the topic. To improve, you should focus on providing more nuanced reasons for ageism in the workplace, such as technological shifts or salary expectations, rather than focusing solely on physical stamina.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay uses basic paragraphing, but the logical flow is frequently interrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear transitions. While there are attempts to use cohesive devices like 'Firstly' and 'In conclusion', the internal structure of the paragraphs is disjointed. Referencing is often confusing, particularly in the second paragraph where the connection between the problem and the proposed solutions is muddled. The progression of ideas is not always smooth, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument consistently. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each sentence builds logically on the previous one would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, often relying on basic terms like 'good', 'easy', and 'work'. There are several instances of incorrect word choice and collocation, such as 'boasted people' (likely meaning 'younger' or 'more energetic') and 'laziest to our wok'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas precisely. To reach a higher band, you should work on expanding your range of topic-specific vocabulary related to employment, age discrimination, and professional development, and focus on using words in their correct grammatical context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are significant issues with subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence structure (e.g., 'A few several countries, that can be very hard challenging'). Many sentences are fragmented or run-on, and the misuse of prepositions and verb tenses is common. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are almost always inaccurate. You need to focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically ensuring that every sentence has a clear subject and verb, and practicing the correct use of articles and pluralization.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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