Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-08-26
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.
What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is argued in some countries, for elder people it is difficult to get a good job, based on their experience. The cause would be companies prefer young people to work more compared to elder people. The solution would be providing some funds after their retirement.
The main cause of the problem is, the companies are willing to encourage young people in work. If elders are hired, the work progress and speed of the work will decreased. On the other hand, if any accident happen to the elder people then it would take more time to recovery, while compared to young people. The another reason would be, technology changes quickly. Some times for elders, it is not that easy to adapt with new advancements in the industries. Where the younger had a scope to learn new things and can easily understand the new technical advancements in the industry.
The solutions for the problem can be maintained by the government. Including the strict rule that, elder people or retired employees need to be paid, but not the same salary when worked. If the rule has been followed, then it would be helpful for the elders. By saving, some percent of amount in their salary when they are in the age of 40. The saving amount should released monthly until their death. The another solution is doing part-time in shops or markets, which creates a flexible employment for the elder people. For instance, a 60 aged person can be a mentor for some students and help them in their carrier options.
In conclusion, the elder people are no longer treated as an employees, behalf of their experience. This is because they are unable to work efficiently, when compared to youngers. The solution for this cause would be, provided some funds after their retirement.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: causes and solutions. However, the development is somewhat limited. The arguments regarding why companies prefer younger workers (speed, recovery time, technology) are relevant but lack depth. The proposed solutions, such as mandatory savings or part-time work, are mentioned but not fully explored or supported with strong reasoning. The position is clear, but the ideas could be extended with more specific examples or logical elaboration to reach a higher band. The conclusion is a bit repetitive and does not fully synthesize the points made.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. There is an attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'On the other hand', 'The another reason', and 'In conclusion'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or grammatically incorrect, such as 'The another reason' or 'The another solution'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, causes, solutions, and conclusion. The progression of ideas is generally clear, though the transition between sentences could be smoother to improve the overall flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'elder people' (should be 'older people' or 'the elderly'), 'behalf of their experience' (incorrect usage), and 'carrier options' (should be 'career'). While the student attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'advancements' and 'flexible employment', the range remains limited. More sophisticated collocations and a wider range of synonyms would enhance the quality of the writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'the work progress and speed of the work will decreased' (incorrect verb form), 'if any accident happen' (subject-verb agreement), and 'The saving amount should released' (missing auxiliary verb). Punctuation is generally functional, but the sentence construction often feels clunky. To improve, the student should focus on verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of passive voice structures.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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