Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-09-02
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.
What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In this working world, although the individuals aged more than 50 have numerous expertise ,still finding an Impeccable occupation is an arduous task for them.In my stance , the dominant grounds are lessen energy as well as the lack of creativity compared to the younger competitors but these dilemmas can ameliorated by subsidizing devoted quotas and setting regulations . This essay will articulate issues and solutions thoroughly.
To commence with , there are ample factors that lead to this struggle . First and foremost, senior demographic lacks the energy and the required creativity for any particular work. To elaborate, old citizens just work on their traditional experiences rather than taking care of the modern demands and the altered circumstances of work place and thus it lead to the myriad os reprecussions
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response is significantly under the required word count of 250 words, reaching only 131 words. Consequently, the task is only partially addressed. While the introduction identifies the causes and solutions, the body paragraph is cut off abruptly, preventing the development of the arguments. The ideas presented—such as 'lack of energy' and 'lack of creativity'—are generalizations that lack sufficient supporting evidence or examples. To improve, you must expand each point with specific explanations and illustrative examples to meet the minimum length requirement and fully develop your response.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay attempts to use cohesive devices such as 'To commence with' and 'First and foremost', but the overall structure is incomplete. The paragraphing is insufficient because the essay stops mid-argument. The logical flow is interrupted by the premature ending, which makes it difficult to assess the progression of ideas. To improve, ensure you complete your paragraphs with concluding sentences and use a wider variety of linking words to connect your ideas more fluidly throughout the entire essay.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is somewhat limited and contains several errors in word choice and collocation. For example, 'lessen energy' should be 'lessened energy' or 'lower energy levels', and 'myriad os reprecussions' contains a spelling error and an awkward phrasing. While you attempt to use more sophisticated words like 'arduous' and 'ameliorated', the overall control is inconsistent. Focus on using vocabulary that you are confident with and ensure that your word choices are grammatically accurate in context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, such as 'the individuals aged more than 50 have numerous expertise' (should be 'have expertise' or 'possess expertise') and 'it lead to' (should be 'it leads to'). The sentence structures are relatively simple, and the punctuation is inconsistent, particularly with spacing around periods. To reach a higher band, you need to demonstrate a better grasp of subject-verb agreement, pluralization, and sentence construction. Practice proofreading your work to catch these basic errors.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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