Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often argued that in some places, it could be very challenging for people over the age of 50 to get employment despite their experience. In developing nations, we can see youths are struggling to get a basic job even after completing their degree. In this case, to find a job after turning 50 is extremely difficult.

The major reason for this problem can be political stability in developing countries where government do a lot of corruption. Due to which it becomes hard to acquire basic needs for the citizens which leads to unemployment and robbery. A clear illustration for this is; In these countries government often lacks to provide basic health care services and no proper development in various sectors which creates challenge to survive day to day life. Thus, it will be hard to get a job for the older citizens despite their experience.

To address this issue, government must focus on to end corruption and providing better facilities for the citizens. The most effective solution is to create job opportunities by establishing many factories and companies. To increase employment rate government should need to do funding to those who wants to do business and to involve in agricultural sectors. for instance; When government start to invest money in manufacturing and tourism sector it will automatically boost the economy of a country. Therefore, investing tax of citizens in various fields will help the government to create employment for the peoples.

In conclusion, eliminating corruption and investing tax money in right place will automatically helps a country to be developed. If government follows this it will assist to older citizens and they don't need to do job after being retired.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt—causes and solutions—but the development is somewhat superficial. The link between political corruption and the specific difficulty faced by workers over 50 is not clearly established; the argument focuses more on general unemployment than the specific age-related bias mentioned in the prompt. While the solutions provided (investing in factories and agriculture) are relevant, they are quite generic and do not directly address the age-related discrimination or the specific needs of older workers. To improve, you should focus on age-specific factors such as ageism, technological shifts, or salary expectations, and provide more targeted solutions like retraining programs or age-diversity incentives.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, the phrase 'Due to which' is grammatically incorrect and awkward as a transition. Additionally, the use of semicolons and punctuation is inconsistent, such as in the sentence 'A clear illustration for this is; In these countries...'. The progression of ideas is sometimes disjointed, particularly in the transition between the problem of corruption and the specific plight of older job seekers. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words would significantly enhance the flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for a higher band. You rely on basic terms like 'good jobs', 'do a lot of corruption', and 'do funding'. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'involve in agricultural sectors' and 'investing tax of citizens'. While the meaning is clear, the lack of sophisticated or topic-specific vocabulary (e.g., 'age-related discrimination', 'economic stagnation', 'vocational retraining') limits the score. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise academic collocations and avoiding repetitive phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('government do a lot of corruption', 'government needs to do funding'), article usage ('the government', 'a country'), and awkward phrasing ('they don't need to do job'). While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. You should focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles, as well as refining your sentence structure to avoid run-on sentences or fragments.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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