Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-09-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In some countries it is very difficult for the people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite of their experience. because of the level of the energy and the age issue may lead to this issue even if the people had experience in their field. An organization must hire a young one who never be lazy in his work therefore this is a reason that old aged persons fin it difficult to have good job.

one of the major problem is that in the heavy work place these people do not follow a full energetic diet to keep them active and focused in their work as we know that a diet plays very important role to maintain our energy level in the body. They follow a poor diet and this directly affects their body and the brain which keep them lazy all the time in their duty. For example most of the worker of the textile sector they consume smoking in the free time in the pakistan therefore industry try to look for the young ones for the daily routine work in the industry.

Secondly, the major issue is that people do not follow the physical exercise as well as proper sleep to keep their body active all the day. Physical exercise is very essential to maintain our body and there is famous saying that a healthy brain is present in the healthy body. As we know that the chinese and japanese are most active and focused person in the world, the reason behind this, is physical exercise and meditation.

In conclusions, poor diet plan and the bad habits are the major problems for that therefore old aged people often face this issue, i believe that if they follow a good routine and stay disciplined then this issue could be solved easily.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing causes of employment difficulties for people over 50, such as perceived energy levels and lifestyle habits, and suggests personal lifestyle changes as a solution. However, the ideas are somewhat limited and heavily reliant on questionable generalisations, such as claiming older workers lack energy due to poor diets and smoking habits like textile workers in Pakistan. Furthermore, the position is not fully explored from a societal or employer perspective, leading to some under-development of the arguments. Despite these limitations, all parts of the prompt are touched upon, earning a Band 5.5.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion, showing basic paragraphing. However, progression is frequently disrupted by poor sentence boundary punctuation, run-on sentences, and abrupt transitions. For instance, the opening paragraph strings multiple ideas together with weak cohesive ties like 'because of' and 'therefore'. Cohesive devices within paragraphs are often inaccurate or repetitive. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as the pronoun use in 'this is a reason that old aged persons fin it difficult'. Overall arrangement is coherent enough to follow, but cohesion is mechanical and faulty, aligning closely with Band 5.0 descriptors.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with frequent lexical and collocational inaccuracies. Examples include 'the heavy work place', 'full energetic diet', 'consume smoking', and 'old aged persons'. There are also spelling and word form errors such as 'fin' instead of 'find' and 'conclusions' instead of 'conclusion'. The range is limited and minimally adequate for conveying simple ideas, but noticeable errors cause occasional difficulty for the reader and prevent the text from achieving a higher band. This corresponds to a Band 5.0 for Lexical Resource.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The text displays a very limited range of structures, with frequent grammatical errors that often impede understanding. There are major issues with sentence structure, such as fragment sentences and run-on sentences lacking appropriate subordination or coordination (e.g., 'In some countries it is very difficult for the people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite of their experience. because of the level of the energy and the age issue may lead to this issue...'). Errors in article usage, prepositions, and subject-verb agreement are pervasive throughout the response. Because attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty and errors cause difficulty, a Band 4.5 is awarded.

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