Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is considered that in a few areas of the globe, elder people who cross 50 years of age, they face challenges to get work in a company after having years of experience. This essay will articulate the problems of this notion, along with the relevant solutions to solve this issue.

Commencing with the problem of this trend is that older individuals have the outdated experience. In other words, in this technological period, most of the companies wants worker who have knowledge and experience of new technology, which makes the culture or work of the company more advanced. For instance, an applicant have knowledge about how to manage data as past theories but he/she dont know how to transcript data in MS excel. Therfore, employers always accept employee with understanding of new technology. To address this, the local government should organize some free workshops for seniors to acclimate the changes of up to date machines.

Furthermore, the second problem associated with this trend is the healthy body and brain working. To explicate, older people are less energetic as compared to young generation and youth actively respond to problems. Young people can handle work load more effectively rather than old individuals. As an example, a headline in the famous newspaper ' The Hindustan Times' in 2018 reported that approximately 27.5% of old worker face difficulties to focus on work and have stress of problem-solving, which makes them less productive. To tackle this, individuals should concentrate on their well-being and authorities should promote healthy activities for every individual like yoga and exercise. Thus, this develops healthy lifestyle and manage work-life balance.

In conclusion, although this trend can cause by outdated experience and actively brain responding yet, the local government should organize free workshops and health based events to give them knowledge about new technologies and healthy lifestyle for older population.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the causes of employment difficulties for people over 50 and measures to solve the issue. The introduction clearly outlines the intention to discuss the causes and solutions. In the body paragraphs, the writer identifies outdated experience with technology and perceived lower physical or mental energy levels as causes. Each cause is paired with a relevant measure, such as free workshops for seniors and promoting healthy activities. However, the development of ideas leans towards over-generalisation and some parts are slightly under-developed, such as the example regarding MS Excel. Overall, the task is addressed adequately and a clear position is maintained throughout, fitting the Band 6 descriptor well.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction and conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different causes and their respective solutions. Cohesive devices are employed to signal progression, such as 'Commencing with the problem', 'In other words', 'To address this', and 'Furthermore'. However, referencing and cohesion are sometimes faulty or mechanical, as seen in awkward transitional phrases like 'Commencing with the problem of this trend is that older individuals have the outdated experience' and 'healthy body and brain working'. Paragraph transitions lack smooth fluidity, but the overall logical organisation is evident.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common lexical items such as 'acclimate', 'well-being', and 'productivity'. However, there are notable word-choice errors, incorrect collocations, and morphological slips throughout the text, including 'elder people' instead of 'elderly people', 'outdated experience', 'dont know how to transcript data', and 'actively brain responding'. Despite these inaccuracies, the vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the main points without severely impeding the reader's understanding, which aligns closely with Band 6 standards.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over structure with clauses like 'In other words, in this technological period, most of the companies wants worker who have knowledge...'. However, there are frequent grammatical and punctuation errors that persist throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('most of the companies wants worker', 'old worker face', 'trend can cause by'), article omissions ('in famous newspaper'), and awkward phrasing ('elder people who cross 50 years of age, they face'). These errors occasionally disrupt the flow, but communication is rarely impeded entirely.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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