Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.
What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In this contemporary era, in various nations getting employed is difficult for the individuals who is over 50 in age, dispite they have experience. The causes why it is difficult and what measures should be taken to solve this problems will be elucidated along with pertinent examples in the following paragraphs.
Out of all the reasons why in some countries it is hard to get job for the people who is above 50, the predominant one to state is that increase in competition. To explain this it can be elaborated that there are numerous people who want to employed, and the jobs are limited but the population is increasing due to which the job can employed the certain amount of people who is young because they are highly qualified and have necessary skills and they familier about new technologies. Therefore, it is evident that because of competition and changes in technologies, it becomes hard to get jobs for the adults who is above 50.
There are severals measures to solve this problems, the main significant one to state is government support. To exemplify this perspective, it can be argued that the higher authorites can introduce new vacancies for the adults who is above 50, for instance by investing in big projects which increase bunch of job opportunites due to which the the people who is 50 or above who wants job for financial stability, the chances of getting jobs increases because of investment. As a result, people above 50 in age get employed.
To recapitulate after analysing all the aforementioned ideas it can be inferred that there are numerous reasons why in some countries people who is 50 or above not getting jobs, because of the increase in the competition and the support from government is the solution to prevent this issue.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt, identifying causes such as intense competition and technological advancements, and offering government support as a countermeasure. However, the development of ideas remains somewhat superficial. For instance, the discussion on technology and competition is repetitive and lacks concrete, specific real-world examples beyond general statements. The conclusion accurately summarizes the main points and maintains a clear position throughout. Because all parts of the prompt are addressed with relevant, albeit somewhat underdeveloped ideas, the response comfortably aligns with the Band 6 descriptor for Task Achievement.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a recognizable introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate causes from measures. However, cohesion is frequently mechanical and repetitive, relying heavily on formulas like 'Out of all the reasons why...' and 'To explain this it can be elaborated that...'. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the sentence 'due to which the job can employed the certain amount of people', which disrupts the logical flow. While the progression of ideas is generally understandable, the clunky transitional phrases and faulty referencing prevent the essay from achieving a higher band score.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing the student to communicate their ideas about employment and competition. However, there are numerous word choice and spelling errors, such as 'dispite' instead of 'despite', 'want to employed' instead of 'want to be employed', 'familier' instead of 'familiar', and 'severals' instead of 'several'. While the student attempts less common items like 'contemporary era' and 'financial stability', the frequent inaccuracies in morphology and collocation occasionally impede fluency and place the essay firmly at Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control over complex forms is weak. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement and relative clauses, as seen in 'the individuals who is over 50' and 'the adults who is above 50'. Additionally, run-on sentences with awkward phrasing—such as 'for instance by investing in big projects which increase bunch of job opportunites due to which the the people who is 50 or above who wants job...'-demonstrate a lack of syntactic control. These persistent errors cause frequent strain for the reader, placing the grammar score at Band 5.0.
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