Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-09-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In many countries, it can be very difficult for people who are above the age of 50 years to get decent jobs, also if they have experience. In my opinion, it a is a myth because if a person have experience it is prioritize then to the other persons, but the field must be relevent.

First of all, some people think that a person who is over the age of 50 years is not able to work as a young person can do it, despite they have some experience. In an IT company we see only young people because the old persons did not have enough knowledge about the technology, in this fileld we must required some experience but thier must be of some knowledge about this field.

On the other hand, in some occupations there must required 30 or 40 years of experience and knowlwdgw about the work then a person is eligible for the work. For instance, a judge of a supreme court in pakistan must hold the experience of 30 years in the judiciary and upto the age of 50 years to become a judge of supreme court, in this sinario the experience and the age both are matter for the job. Also we see the other fileds like medical and engineering, there must be a person spend a major part of thier life to achieve thier desired position.

In conclusion, i say that the age of 50 as well as experience is matter in some jobs and there are also some filelds of work in which we did not required any experience but only knowldege of the work is enough for that job.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to address both parts of the task regarding the causes of difficulties for older workers and potential solutions. However, the development of ideas is limited and somewhat confused. For instance, the writer states 'it a is a myth' regarding employment difficulties, which contradicts the prompt's premise, and then struggles to articulate clear causes and solutions. While examples are provided, such as supreme court judges and IT companies, the reasoning is underdeveloped and wanders into tangents about experience requirements rather than directly exploring systemic causes of ageism or practical measures to solve it. Consequently, the performance aligns most closely with the Band 5 descriptors, as the task is addressed only partially and the position is not always clearly maintained throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the logical progression is frequently disrupted by awkward transitions and confusing sentence connections. Cohesive devices are either missing, inadequate, or mechanically applied, such as the repetitive use of 'First of all,' 'On the other hand,' and 'In conclusion.' Referencing is occasionally unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the train of thought. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion within paragraphs is weak. These features place the response firmly at Band 5 for coherence and cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, frequently impeded by numerous spelling and word-choice errors, such as 'relevent' instead of relevant, 'fileld' instead of field, 'knowlwdgw' instead of knowledge, and 'sinario' instead of scenario. While the writer attempts some less common terms like 'judiciary' and 'occupations,' the heavy concentration of lexical errors and limited control over word formation and spelling causes noticeable difficulty for the reader and restricts the score to a Band 4.0, though the presence of some topic-related vocabulary prevents a lower rating.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The grammatical structure of the essay is heavily flawed, featuring a very limited range of accurate complex structures. Frequent errors in subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'a person have experience', 'there must required'), tense consistency, and punctuation pervade the text. Many sentences are grammatically unstable, which frequently impedes communication and requires the reader to re-read to grasp the intended meaning. Because errors are frequent and cause considerable difficulty for the reader, the writing reflects the Band 4 descriptors for grammatical range and accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.