Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

People over the age of 50 find it hard to secure a job in spite of having vast experience, in some countries. Individuals above the age of fifty years are considered to be too old and can be expecting a higher salary due to their experience. Governments should set a quota for elderly people and a defined salary range for private companies.

A man over the age of fifty years can be considered too old and unfit for a specific job by many employers. It could be due to the fact that human bodies tend to be less energetic as they age, whereas employers are seeking energetic young people to fit into this fast paced world. Another reason for hesitation among business owners for hiring an old person can be that they automatically assume the higher salary demand. It is common for bosses to think that an experienced man is going to expect a higher wage rate as compared to a young individual with less experience. For instance, CEOs of major companies like Google and Microsoft get millions of dollars in salaries whereas a young individual in the same company have their income in thousands only.

One remedy for this problem can that the governments should introduce a quota system for elder professional people. Doing this can force the companies to hire a minimum amount of people over 50 each year to counter the issue of unemployment. While doing this, governments should also set a salary range for old people as per their respective professions. In this way, companies will be more willing to hire old people as they will not have to worry about the unexpected salary demands.

In conclusion, although people over fifty can be less energetic and expecting more salaries due to their experience, the state should set a minimum wage rate and a quota to counter the issue of unemployment.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by identifying both causes (perceptions of lower energy and assumptions about higher salary demands) and offering measures (government quotas and salary ranges). The position is clear throughout the essay. However, the development of ideas could be more comprehensive. For instance, the example provided about Google and Microsoft CEOs earning millions compared to young employees earning thousands is somewhat exaggerated and only tangentially relates to ordinary workers over 50. Despite this minor limitation in idea development, the essay adequately covers the prompt and presents a clear, relevant argument. Therefore, it meets the standard for Band 6.5, leaning towards Band 7.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression from introduction to body paragraphs and conclusion. Each paragraph has a discernible central topic: the introduction outlines the problem and solutions, the first body paragraph discusses the causes, the second body paragraph proposes the remedies, and the conclusion summarises the main points. Paragraphing is used appropriately. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes slightly mechanical or repetitive, such as the frequent reliance on transitional phrases like 'Another reason for' and 'One remedy for this problem can that'. Referencing is generally clear, but overall the cohesive control aligns well with the Band 6 descriptors.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common lexical items such as 'unemployment', 'professionals', and 'counter the issue'. There are some acceptable collocations like 'fast-paced world' and 'quota system'. However, there are noticeable word-choice inaccuracies and awkward phrasing, such as 'elder professional people' instead of 'older professionals', and 'expecting more salaries' instead of 'expecting higher salaries'. Spelling is generally accurate, and vocabulary errors do not impede communication, placing the response solidly in the Band 6 category.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over grammar with complex structures such as 'While doing this, governments should also set a salary range...' and 'In this way, companies will be more willing to hire old people as they will not have to worry about...'. However, there are several grammatical errors and awkward constructions throughout the text. For example, there is a missing verb in the sentence 'One remedy for this problem can that the governments...', and articles are sometimes misused or omitted (e.g., 'an old person' versus 'old people'). Punctuation is generally fine, but the grammatical errors place it at Band 6.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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