Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-03
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.
What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In some countries we can see a decline in requirement of job opportunity for people over the age of 50 , despite their experiences in the required field , however young people get the job easily compared to them and with less experience.
In my opinon the work providers are seeking for people with active and presist body that feels less stress and can manage the work load and the mental pressure on them to conclude the work at the given timeline and a fruitful enviornment would be maintained in the company but the young generation don't have the expertise to elevate and make the company prominent in the world. Recently I visited a clothing brand outlet which only had young salesman to look after the outlet but they were lacking the ability to convey the customer in their favour or buy an item from them instead they were making things more complex and eventually causing a decline in their sales, then I visited another outlet with young and old generation working together in this the enviornment was very glorious and blissful as the young ones were perfectly handling the techonology part whereas the old ones with their experience were easily coping with costumer and the both generations making the sales elevate.
On the other hand if people over the age of 50 feeling to get a job difficult, then respected government should pass some laws that a fixed proportion of seats are fixed for them in their respective field and should also get a wage more or equal to the younger one on the same post.
To conclude, I would like to say that both generations should work together as it will be benificial for the company only and government should imply some rules to help the people over age 50 get job easily.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both the causes behind older workers struggling to find employment and proposing solutions, such as government legislation and intergenerational workplaces. However, the development of ideas is uneven. For instance, the cause related to physical endurance and stress is somewhat simplistic and relies heavily on a single extended personal anecdote about visiting clothing brand outlets rather than broader socio-economic analysis. The position is generally clear throughout, but the reasoning can occasionally wander, preventing the response from reaching a higher level of thoroughness and extension.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a recognizable introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Ideas are connected using basic cohesive devices such as 'In my opinion', 'On the other hand', and 'To conclude'. However, referencing and cohesion can be faulty or mechanical at times, particularly in long, run-on sentences like the second paragraph where multiple clauses are joined loosely with conjunctions like 'and' without adequate punctuation or clear structural progression. Paragraphing is present, but internal cohesion within the body paragraphs could be managed more smoothly to guide the reader effortlessly through the argument.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The writer demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range for the task, attempting some less common words and phrases such as 'fruitful environment', 'prominent', and 'intergenerational' concepts implied through context. However, there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations that reflect a limited command of word choice and word formation. Examples include 'work providers' instead of 'employers', 'presist body' instead of 'resilient physique', 'convey the customer' instead of 'persuade customers', and spelling mistakes such as 'opinon', 'enviornment', 'techonology', and 'benificial'. These errors do not completely impede communication, but they restrict the lexical score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response shows a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt at varied syntactic structures. However, there are frequent errors in grammar, punctuation, and article usage that reflect a limited control of complex patterns. Examples of errors include missing articles ('get job easily', 'respected government'), faulty subject-verb agreement or tense consistency ('the young generation don't have', 'people over the age of 50 feeling to get a job difficult'), and run-on structures lacking proper punctuation. While these errors rarely completely obscure the intended meaning, they occur regularly enough to disrupt the flow and prevent higher grammatical accuracy.
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