Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this cut throat competetion, individuals are doing ample of degrees and hardwork for getting good jobs and wages. Due to which, in few nations, it is becoming an arduous task for elderly people who are over 50 to get better jobs, despite their experience. This essay intends to anaylse the reasons as well as soultions to overcome this issue.

To commence with, there are myraid causes behind this tendency. The first and foremost is that, due to technology younglings have vast knowledge regarding work and they are fit which promote difficulties on the path of old people. To explain it, after the age of 50 people are not physically as well as mentally fit and they are soon feeling exhaust but youngsters are much fit because of the age so they are spending so much time on workplace without feeling tired. Apart from this, due to technology they are much aware regarding current affairs as compare to older ones. Thus, elderly individuals feel dificulty to find best jobs for them.

Furthermore, There are multifarious solutions to solve this problem. Firstly, older people should keep themselves healthy and stay connect with social media. To elaborate it, over the age of 50 people should join fitness classes and do meditation along with excercise. Despite of this, they should give more preference to healthy food like eat vegetables, fruits and some healthy meals which will be very helpful for them.

To recapitulate, undoutedly it is very difficult for older people to compete with younglings but they should encouage and motivate to themselves by doing physically activities and stay touch with current happings.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both the causes and solutions regarding the employment difficulties faced by people over 50. However, the ideas remain somewhat limited and under-developed. For instance, the argument that older people are physically and mentally exhausted while youngsters are fit is repetitive and lacks sufficient extension with concrete examples or evidence. Similarly, the proposed solutions, such as joining fitness classes and eating vegetables, are basic and only partially developed in relation to the professional context of the prompt. The writer establishes a clear position, but the overall treatment of the topic stays at a general level rather than fully exploring the nuances of ageism and workforce adaptation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt at logical organisation, making use of standard introductory and concluding paragraphs alongside distinct body paragraphs for causes and solutions. However, cohesion is sometimes faulty or mechanical, relying on repetitive transitional phrases such as 'To begin with' and 'To explain it.' Referencing is not always clear, and the logical progression between sentences occasionally stumbles, such as the abrupt transition from technological awareness to physical fitness in the second paragraph. Paragraphing is used adequately to separate main ideas, but the internal flow within paragraphs requires smoother logical links to achieve a higher level of cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is minimally adequate for the task, providing enough range to communicate the basic ideas. The writer attempts less common vocabulary, such as 'cut throat competition,' 'arduous task,' and 'multifarious solutions,' but these attempts are frequently marred by inaccuracies in word choice, spelling, and collocation. For instance, 'cut throat competetion' contains a spelling error, 'ample of degrees' is an unnatural collocation, and 'younglings' is inappropriate in an academic context. There are noticeable lexical errors, such as 'dificulty,' 'exceed,' or awkward phrasing like 'soon feeling exhaust,' which cause some difficulty for the reader and prevent the vocabulary from reaching a higher level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writing displays a limited range of structures, relying mostly on simple sentences alongside attempted complex structures that are often faulty. There are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that can cause difficulty for the reader, including article omissions, subject-verb agreement issues, and incorrect prepositions. Examples include 'doing ample of degrees and hardwork,' 'older people should keep themselves healthy and stay connect,' and 'they should encouage and motivate to themselves.' Complex clauses frequently contain structural flaws, such as 'Due to which, in few nations, it is becoming...' which misuses relative clauses as sentence starters. Punctuation is generally basic, and control over complex grammatical patterns remains inconsistent throughout the essay.

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