Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.
What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
It today's digitalized world, the issues of unemployment for the senior individuals aged 50 rapidly increasing over the passage of time.
At the beggining, i have to discuss the root cause of this problem is the invention of artificial intelligence and many other digitalization in this con-temporary world. The lack of awareness of technology amoung the adults by this they have to face lots of problems in terms of employment even though they are well experienced consequently they did not much awared about the utilization of latest technology. Similarly, in the countries where young individuals hardly get employment due to competency. The consequences of this lackness elderly faces such problems.
On the other hand, there are several steps that government or social media should have to take for senior individuals is that awareness of automated workflow by this they were uptodate through news channels, social media and also tech channels by this step this senario will be improved over time
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response only minimally addresses the prompt, touching upon the causes of employment difficulties for older adults and suggesting a basic measure involving government or media awareness. However, the ideas are severely underdeveloped, and the argument lacks sufficient support or relevant examples. Furthermore, the length requirement of 250 words has not been met, as the student's response contains only 160 words, which restricts the depth and breadth of the discussion. To achieve a higher band, the writer must ensure the minimum word count is fulfilled, expand fully on both causes and solutions, and provide concrete examples and explanations to substantiate the claims.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response shows some basic organization into paragraphs, attempting an introduction, body, and conclusion, but there is no clear overall progression of ideas. Cohesive devices are inadequate or misused; for example, transitional phrases like 'At the beggining, i have to discuss' and 'On the other hand' are awkwardly integrated and fail to logically link the arguments. Referencing is also weak, making it difficult to follow the flow of thought between sentences. To move to a higher band, the writer needs to employ a wider range of cohesive devices accurately, ensure logical transitions between paragraphs, and structure the argument so that the progression of ideas is smooth and easy to follow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for the task. There are noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and spelling, such as 'beggining', 'amoung', 'lackness', and 'awared', which indicate a restricted control of lexical features. The range of vocabulary is basic and repetitive, relying heavily on simple terms like 'problems', 'technology', and 'individuals'. To progress to a higher band, the writer must expand their vocabulary range, incorporate less common lexical items with greater precision regarding collocation and style, and significantly improve spelling and word formation to ensure smooth communication without causing strain for the reader.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The grammatical range is very limited, consisting mostly of simple and attempted complex sentences that are heavily flawed. Frequent errors in sentence structure, subject-verb agreement, and prepositions are evident throughout the text, such as in the opening sentence 'It today's digitalized world, the issues of unemployment for the senior individuals aged 50 rapidly increasing' which lacks a main verb. Punctuation is also poorly controlled, leading to run-on structures that distort meaning. To lift this criterion to a higher band, the writer needs to demonstrate a greater variety of complex sentence forms with accurate control, minimize frequent structural errors, and ensure that basic grammatical rules and punctuation are applied correctly across all sentences.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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